


Surprise!

by leeyanatasya



Category: Day6 (Band)
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Idiots in Love, Late Night Conversations, Light Angst, Long-Term Relationship(s), Surprise Party, Surprises, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, True Love
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-01
Updated: 2019-11-03
Packaged: 2019-11-07 12:48:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 36,226
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17960834
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/leeyanatasya/pseuds/leeyanatasya
Summary: Park Sungjin makes it clear that he is not one for birthday celebrations. But when his friends are hell-bent on throwing him a surprise party this year, someone is bound to get the surprise of a lifetime.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Find more of my work on twitter: @/endlesskyh
> 
> Talk to me on twitter or curious cat:  
> curiouscat.me/endlesskyh !

Park Sungjin is not one for birthdays. And he has made this inherently clear.

“No parties, no wishes, no gifts – especially none with a surprise element as part of the package. We’re spending the night eating chicken and beer, as we always do, before passing out for an hour before we get back on track with band practice, as we always do. Please, I beg you, no surprises.”

Those are the words that leave his lips each year, on the days leading up to the special occasion, and you’ve more than managed to gradually accept it over the years – albeit the diligent attempts at trying to persuade him otherwise when you first got together. 

Even as sophomores, you and Sungjin were the lovebirds of the school; being two of the few privileged students at the top of the social hierarchy was unequivocally a factor in everyone’s general interest in your relationship – he was constantly in the spotlight as the frontman of the school band and you had gained everyone’s attention by being elected as student body president – but it was more so the element of surprise that made you both the toast of the town. No one knew exactly how you two managed to get together – prying questions have been asked plenty, but you both know to keep your mouth shut – and such enigma always captures the interest of high school students. You assumed the spotlight would be on someone else by the end of the week, but it stayed with you until graduation; according to Brian, it is simply because high school couples that last more than three months are just automatically levelled up to “permanent spotlight,” status, and they should accept it and lavish in the moment. 

Secretly, you did. Very much publicly, Sungjin did not. He hates the attention, he hates the prying eyes that follow wherever he walks, he hates hearing his name amongst whispers in the crowd; it’s ironic for the boy who was naturally popular all throughout high school, having been in a band, but he claims that the whispers amplified after you got together, and it took him a long while to adjust to it all before gradually coming to ignore the bright light shining upon him.. Even so, he still tries hard to evade any form of unwanted attention he can, which brings us back to the birthday celebrations. 

No matter the situation, no matter the persuasion – Park Sungjin remains adamant that the 16th of January be treated like every other day. You can’t say you support – or even like – his choice, always having been one to indulge in a little extravagance, but you accept it as part of him. Park Sungjin is not one for birthdays, and that is who he is. 

Which is why, for the life of everything, you can’t find a reason as to why his friends have decided to throw him a fucking surprise party this year around. 

“He’ll hate this,” you remark the minute his friends tell you of the plan, shaking your head vigorously at the mere idea of it. “He will utterly, completely hate this.”

“Just because he says it doesn’t mean it’s true,” Park Jaehyung argues, sitting on the wooden floor of your apartment as he tunes his guitar. “I’m sure he’s secretly been wanting us to throw him a party all these years – he’s been wanting his girlfriend to throw him one.”

You sneer at the blond boy from a distance, contemplating on whether you should throw your shoe at him from across the room. Leave it to Jae to come up with non-substantial arguments. You’re barely even baffled at this point. “And the reason why he’s been keeping his desire to have a surprise party for over eight years is – ?”

“Maybe he hasn’t been keeping it a secret. Maybe you just don’t pay as close attention as his best friends to notice.”

“Best friends that decided to finally fulfil his wish after eight fucking years?”

“Hey, we’re slow. But we take notice,” Brian speaks abruptly, and you groan as you turn to face the man beside you, who grins his ears off as your eyes meet. 

“You can’t actually agree with this, Brian.”

“Actually, I’m the beautiful mastermind behind this.”

“What – ? Brian, you know Sungjin better than anyone. He despises surprises. Especially considering the amount of times he’s made that clear – “

“Oh, come on. It won’t kill him to have one damn party. Besides, he might actually enjoy himself. You don’t think I’m letting my best friend spend the rest of his 20s without getting hilariously fucking wasted in front of a crowd, do you?”

“He gets drunk plenty fine with chicken and beer.”

“Yes, but there is no public humiliation. Are you even listening to me?”

“Are you idiots listening to me?” you retort, moving your gaze back and forth between a nonchalant guitarist and a very amused best friend; both of whom seem to be hell-bent on going through with their plan, and both of whom are adamant that nothing can change their minds. You thought of ringing Wonpil, your only hope for a shred of rationality, but he and Dowoon are still stuck overseas after multiple transits and delayed flights; any sort of support he could give you is now lost in the midst of frustration and sleep deprivation. 

There is simply no point in even trying to argue, and as the saying goes: when you can’t beat them, join them.

“Fine. I’ll let this party happen. But I am not helping you out with anything – you both are staring down the barrel of a gun right now, and I don’t want to be a part of it when Sungjin’s the one pulling the trigger.”

Kang Brian laughs, finding your words just that damn hilarious. He reaches out and puts an arm over your shoulder, rubbing his knuckles in your hair as if you were a toddler, and not older than him by a year. “You’re so cheesy, you know that? No wonder you and Sungjin belong together. Don’t worry, you don’t need to do crap – just show up at the restaurant a week from now by ten with the birthday boy. And if he gets mad, we’ll insist that you had no idea about anything.”

“This is a dumb plan. He’ll figure it out before it even commences.”

“Not if we don’t say anything. Trust me, someone is going to have the surprise of a lifetime. I can guarantee you that.”

Kang Brian stares you dead in the eye, a glint of confidence in them. He doesn’t have a shred of a doubt that this entire plan will be anything less than a success, and that both comforts and terrifies you. It isn’t easy leaving the two boys in front of you to their mischievous schemes – who knows what kind of tricks they have up their sleeves?

“Alright,” you concede, “I’ll be at the dumb restaurant on time.”

“That’s our girl.” Jae grins at you, strumming his guitar to the tune of the birthday song, and you roll your eyes in mild annoyance. “What a good girlfriend you are.”

A shoe comes flying across the room and lands next to a guitar on an empty spot on the floor, right where the figure of a blond boy who ran for the hills in fear of his infuriated friend should have been.


	2. Chapter 2

“We need you to bring us the balloons.”

“I will actually fucking kill you.”

“We left the balloons! The balloons are important!   
Please just bring us the balloons.”

“How could you tell me this less than an hour before I’m supposed to meet Sungjin? I don’t have time to drive to the restaurant and back to the apartment to pick him up.”

“Look, just tell him there’s been an emergency and you’ll meet him at the restaurant. He won’t mind.”

“Then he’ll know I’m a fucking accomplice, idiots!”

“My dear brother-from-another-mother’s girlfriend of eight years, please bring us the decorations we need in order to create an extravagant party for your lover. We all love him to pieces, we want to make this perfect,” Brian says into the phone, the hint of irony not lost in his tone. You growl into your own, wondering why the hell you even put up with these dumbasses in the first place. 

Sensing the anger that is explicitly exuding from the other end of the line, Brian gulps. “We love you to pieces too, you know. Please help us. We need you here in a half hour to ensure the party starts on time.”  
You sigh, wondering how much tolerance you can continue to muster before you inevitably implode. Back in high school, these boys would make you sweat, teasing and aggravating you to no end. You enjoyed their company, but they sure as hell could be a pain in the ass. From Park Jaehyung’s sarcastic remarks to Kang Brian’s playful teasing to Yoon Dowoon’s hidden pranks, the only person other than Sungjin that you could count on was Kim Wonpil, but even he had a mischievous side from time to time. It is genuinely a miracle that you’ve even managed to survive them all throughout high school.

But they’ve been by your side for eight years. You have crossed more than enough bridges together to know that when it came to Sungjin, these boys would wrap the entire world in a single gift if he would accept it. It is one of the few things that they have in common with you. 

Which is why there is also no point in arguing with their annoying asses.

“Are you positive you can’t get anyone else to send you the balloons?” you speak, putting on Sungjin’s jacket before you reach for your keys.

“You’re the only one who has our apartment key that can make it here in time. Please.”

“Fine. But you owe me.”

“I promise Sungjin will pay for our favour wholeheartedly.”

“You guys get on my nerves, you know that?”

“Thank you. What a good girlfriend you are.”

You hang up the phone, feeling smoke coming out of your ears. At this rate, instead of the world, you’re convinced that perhaps the cadavers of his precious best friends would be a much better present for the birthday boy.

\- - -

You’ve never been good at lying to your boyfriend. So it takes an incredible amount of preparation in terms of acting and suppressing guilt on your part before you finally decide it’s best to call him. You’re on your way to the venue, having rushed to the boys’ apartment to pick up the boxes of balloons, so that part isn’t a lie, but if he starts asking questions is when the going gets tough; the ideal way is to keep it short and vague, but that has never been your forte, and the boy can see through you as if you were made of glass.

He’s going to find out. He definitely is. We’re all fucking screwed. 

You make the call. 

It takes no more than three rings before the voice on the other end greets you. 

“Hey, sunshine. Are you on your way? I’m not ready yet though.”

“Hey, baby,” you answer, trying best to stop your voice from going an octave higher, which inevitably happens whenever you do try to lie. “I – something came up at work that I have to take care of. It’ll barely be a minute and I can definitely make dinner, but it does mean I can’t pick you up. I’m so sorry for springing this on you.”

You turn a corner onto another route as silence follows your words. Sungjin doesn’t speak, but you can make out muffled noises in the background. He must be getting ready, and guilt starts to well up in you –

“She’s arriving soon. Take out the fucking boxes, Brian.”

Jae’s voice rings throughout your car, loud and clear as you have Sungjin on a hands-free call. Your heart stops at the sound, shocked beyond imagine, so much so that you abruptly pull the brakes and stop the car on the side of the road. 

“What the fuck was that?”

Muffled noises greet you again, and you feel your face heat up from the bewilderment of it all. 

Is Jae with Sungjin? Shouldn’t he be at the restaurant? What the hell is going on?

“Hey sunshine, sorry that was Jae. Apparently, you called him and told him to pick me up? That’s sweet, but you didn’t have to.”

“No, I didn’t. And I clearly heard him call Brian – “ 

“Don’t worry about not picking me up, okay? I’ll see you at the restaurant soon. Just you and me and a wandering Jae eating chicken and beer at our favourite place. It’ll be great! I love you.”

“Wait, but I wanted to wish you happy – “

He hangs up the call, and you are left stunned. 

You inhale deeply as your hands grip the wheel, trying to make some sort of sense regarding the entire situation. 

If Park Jaehyung is able to drive to Sungjin’s home to pick him up, he sure as hell would have had time to go fetch the decorations and head back to the restaurant.

Not to mention that he was distinctly calling Brian’s name in the background – they couldn’t both have possibly decided to pick him up, not with the venue in its supposed chaos. As far as you’re concerned, Wonpil and Dowoon have yet to land from their flight home, so being at Sungjin’s home would mean that the idiots have left the venue for you to be greeted with vacancy. You wouldn’t put it past them on any other occasion, but this is Sungjin’s birthday we’re talking about – the world must be presented to him in a gift; everything must be picture perfect. 

They’re lying to you. Not just them, but Sungjin as well; and you can’t fathom why.

With a sigh, you start the car and resume your journey to the venue, fully aware that the boys have a scheme in motion; and that Sungjin is not the one on the receiving end of the surprise.


	3. Chapter 3

There is just so much anger one can muster. But as you stand in the vacant room, boxes in hand and not a single familiar face in sight, you start to wonder if you might just end up imploding at any second. 

Jae and Brian are truly gone; they are nowhere to be seen. When you’d asked the waiters, they told you that two boys had been in the restaurant since the evening, getting everything ready for the party – but they had left less than an hour ago, claiming to be back before midnight. One of the waiters politely escorted you to the private section of the restaurant that had been booked for the party, and you had taken in the entire sight the minute you opened the door; the whole place has been decorated except for the absence of balloons; gold and silver streamers, a banner with the words ‘SURPRISE!’ in big, block letters; the tables have also been laid out, simply waiting for food to be served on the plates. The decor is simplistic, though you admit that it feels more like a teenager’s birthday party – you aren’t surprised, however. Personally, you would wish for a bit more extravagance – but this is Sungjin’s party, and he would already deem all of this unnecessary. The boys are smart for keeping things as minimalistic as they can. 

Though they still are very much the dumbasses that have left you fucking behind. 

You place the balloons on an empty table and dial Jae’s number; it takes three rings for your call to be sent to voicemail. You call Brian next; the same shit happens. You alternately dial both numbers several times, trying to find out where the hell they’ve run off to. The clock is ticking, and according to their schedule, Sungjin’s party is supposed to start in half an hour. If the staff’s claims that the boys will be back at midnight is true, then why the hell did they drag you out here so early? And why the hell would they lie about the timing of a damn party; one that is slowly crumbling to pieces before it has even begun? You always knew that this entire thing would be flawed in one way or another; you correctly expected the decor to be left behind, you presumed that Sungjin would uncover the secret and throw a fit; but you never expected it would fall to pieces in such a baffling way. The boys leaving you behind to continue the work they left behind? They’re idiots, but they aren’t complete assholes. 

What the hell are they plotting?

You dial Jae’s number again – it goes straight to voicemail. You are about to ring Brian for the nth time when –

Your phone beeps. It is a message from Jae.

Is he really not there yet? I swear he owes me for having you blow up my phone like this. 

What –

Before you can even comprehend his words, your phone begins ringing. It’s Sungjin – the birthday boy. The one you haven’t even tried to reach, because you can barely lie to him, and you didn’t want to risk exposing the surprise on the off-chance that he is still oblivious. Of course, as his name flashes on your phone screen, that thought just seems ridiculous now.   
If he still doesn’t know, then you might as well just tell him. He doesn’t even like celebrating, and there is no use trying to make things complicated when there are only few hours left to a such a big day. 

You pick up the call. 

“Sungjin. I –“ 

“Hey, sunshine. I’m outside the restaurant. Could you come out?”


	4. Chapter 4

Eight years ago, Park Sungjin had been the one to like you first, but it was someone else that helped make the first move.

It was two weeks after the student body elections, and you had a meeting with the planning committee regarding the students’ talent showcase to held in a month’s time; there was so much work instantaneously piled onto you from the minute you were declared president, and gradually the responsibilities have started to weigh down on you. From the organising student activities to student council meetings to having to deal with teachers and students who always seem to have an opinion regarding issues that don’t directly involve them, you’d begun to wonder if all of it is truly worth it. 

“President. Hey, are you alright?”

You snapped yourself back to the situation at hand, turning to your vice president who has a worried look on his face; unlike some school councils where the vices leave everything in the hands of their leader, yours was one that you could truly count on. Having the workload divided evenly between you both had somewhat lessened your burden, and you were grateful to him for being so willing to help out with everything.   
At least you’ve got one person you can truly count on.   
“I’m fine, Wonpil. Just got a bit distracted, sorry.”  
“It’s fine. We just need to confirm the set list with the band for the showcase, and we’ll be home in no time.”

“Right. We’re meeting with the guitarist, right?”

“Yeah, apparently Sungjin can’t make it –“

It was then that a blond boy came trudging into the room, guitar case slung over his shoulder, grinning from ear-to-ear as he approached the desk you were sitting at. He halted in place in front of you and Wonpil, and you look up at the tall giant, only to realise that he was peering down at you. You stared back, not breaking eye contact; he gave you this inexplicable feeling of being challenged, and you hadn’t the slightest clue why – until the boy’s grin reappeared, and a mischievous glint became distinct in his eyes.   
He bowed in front of you. You jumped back in your seat, more than surprised by the sudden gesture. He lifted his head up and winked, still very much grinning, and a part of you is convinced that the boy was mocking you.

“Madam president, it’s awfully nice to meet you. I see you’re not easily intimidated – which is good for me and Brian, given the fact that our futures will very well align.”

“I don’t understand – “

“This is Jae,” Wonpil interrupted you, sighing at the sight of the boy in front of him. “Can you take a seat, dude? We need to get this done; I’m tired as hell right now.”

“Ah, sadly Wonpil, there has been a change of plans. You and I will be heading to the basketball court to throw some hoops even though you incredibly suck, and our beloved president over here will be discussing the set list with the man himself – our very dear frontman.”

Wonpil raised an eyebrow at Jae, and the latter shrugged in nonchalance. It was more than obvious that there was something planned, a hidden scheme of sorts – you couldn’t tell what, but you assumed he’d made a pact with Wonpil to get him off early, and while you trusted Wonpil a whole lot, you wouldn’t put it past him to try and get the hell out of there. 

You knew you didn’t have anything to prove, but the inexplicable feeling of being challenged had taken over. You could handle one more damn meeting by yourself, without your vice. Whatever Jae and Wonpil had planned for themselves, they could go on ahead and do what they want. At the very least, you weren’t involved in their mischiefs. 

Little did you know, that very plan revolved around you.

“I don’t think I should leave – “ 

“Don’t worry about it, Wonpil,” you spoke, looking between him and the grinning blond boy. “You can go on ahead. It’s just another five minutes with the frontman, anyway. I’ll tell you all the details tomorrow.”  
Wonpil stared at you in hesitation, and you gave him a nod of encouragement – it took a mere few seconds for the boy to finally concede and pick up his bags.   
“I’ll see you tomorrow, then. Get home safe, okay?”  
You nodded, and turned your attention back to the guitarist. As you turned, he gave you another quick bow, and stood back up just to wink at you again.   
“You know, when I heard that you were elected as student body president as a sophomore, I had my doubts – but you seem cool. In fact, you’re letting your vice – my own best friend – off early without any hesitation, so that makes you more than cool in my book. What a truly good president you are.” 

Jae’s words caused your cheeks to flush, but you refused to acknowledge the compliment and simply smiled; you knew that it was more than impressive to be picked as student body president at a younger age than most. It was what brought you into the spotlight; it gave you the sudden boost of popularity you’d never expected to receive, but was secretly thankful for.   
A knock then came at the door. The three of you turned in the direction of the sound, and you could hear Jae chuckling to himself. 

“And I believe this is where our futures align. Goodbye, madam president. Your next appointment has arrived.”   
Park Jaehyung swung an arm around Wonpil’s shoulders and dragged him to the door. He stepped back and opened it, only to reveal his band’s very own frontman.

The classmate of yours stood a head shorter than Jae, guitar case slung over his shoulders, hands in his pockets and long hair covering his eyes. You’d only seen him with his hair pushed back once, when he had performed with his band at last year’s showcase; sitting in the front row, you’d gotten a good view of the performers, and the first feature you’d noticed about the frontman was his sparkling eyes. His eyes shone as if they’d managed to encapsulate a starry night sky, and it was always a mystery to you as to why he’d keep them concealed beneath his hair.

In due time, you’d come to find that it was because his eyes captivated the spotlight the most; keeping them hidden, though utterly ridiculous, meant not having to bother with that aspect in the wide range of attention he received. It would take you having to tell him that his eyes captivated you for him to not only push his hair back, but get rid of it altogether for his eyes to be clearly seen.

But right then, the boy with sparkling eyes couldn’t even look into yours as he was dragged into the room by an enthusiastic Jae, who gave you one more wink before letting the door close behind him and your vice. Park Sungjin took a seat opposite you, leaning his guitar against the table. He opened the case and took out a yellow notepad, placing it on the desk and pushing it towards you.

“The set list. All the songs we’re planning to perform are here,” he spoke, keeping his head down, running his fingers through his hair. You grabbed the notepad and ran your eyes over the songs, making note of the lengths and genres that had been written in detail on the sheet. 

For everyone else, you had to tell them more than twice to explicitly state every detail of their performance. This boy in front of you had done so without being asked. You were more than impressed.  
“Thanks for listing everything out. Though, I believe that we need to remove one song as to not delay the – “

The boy looked up and met your eyes for the first time since he’d walked in. He’d run his hands through hair so much that he’d pulled it back, revealing the night-trapping eyes. 

You’d seen them once last year and they’d grabbed your attention. This time, as you saw them up close, they captivated you fully, so much so that you’d stopped mid-sentence and hadn’t even realised. Sungjin raised an eyebrow at you, wondering why you’d lost your words, before slowly tapping your shoulder as to alert you back to reality. 

You shook your head slowly as you pulled yourself back to the matter at hand, tearing your gaze away from his eyes.

“Right. So as I said – “ 

“Why did you grow quiet suddenly?” 

You bit your lip as the question was asked, trying your best not to make eye contact again. You didn’t want to embarrass yourself a second time, not when he’d clearly noticed the oddness your prior action. 

“I – I just forgot what I wanted to say.”

“I think that’s a lie. Your voice suddenly got all high.”  
Your cheeks flushed, finally conceding to the fact that you’d been caught. Even back then, even without the closeness and love you’d conjured for eight whole years, you were awfully bad at lying to Park Sungjin.

“I – I just think your eyes are really pretty. That’s all.”

Your words made his eyes widen in surprise, clearly not expecting such an honest answer. You quickly diverted the topic back towards the set list, wanting to get rid of the sudden tension in the room and the first-hand embarrassment that was overwhelming you. 

Thankfully, Sungjin didn’t press any further, and you spent the entire time discussing the band’s performance for the showcase, no other outside topics meandering their way into conversation.

Of course, the entire time, you pretended not to notice the small smile that remained permanent on Park Sungjin’s lips.

\- - -

Eight years ago, Park Sungjin’s eyes that managed to encapsulate a starry night sky had pulled you in and never released you from their grasp. Eight years later, underneath the actual starry night sky, Park Sungjin waits as you step onto the sidewalk, bewildered beyond your wildest . 

When you hurried out of the restaurant, you mumbled several profanities along the way – most of which aimed the two that got away – and your mind raced with questions and answers you sought to pry out of your boyfriend, the one person who seems to exactly what the hell is going on, despite the irony that he is the only one who’s supposed to remain in the dark.   
You were a mix of everything at once – fury, confusion, disappointment, resentment – and its colours overwhelmed you so much to the point where all you see as you walked out the door.

But as you stepped out onto the sidewalk, and you come face-to-face with the boy who has never failed to make your heart smile, the colour vanishes, and you are left without words. 

Park Sungjin smiles as you stand before him, more than a little eager by your presence, his eyes appearing to shine brighter than before. You cross your arms over your chest, not wanting to let your guard down, adamant that he knows just how aggravated you truly are. You’re never one to step down from a fight, especially when it is your boyfriend on enemy territory.   
Back in high school, Brian claims your stubbornness will take you places, as a trait so strong is unachievable; Wonpil claims you’re the fiercest person he knows, and that it is your determination to get what you want that has caused the spotlight to remain by your side all throughout your teenage years.

To the rest of the world, you are intimidating; you’re stubborn, you’re fierce, you take what you want despite what anyone says; to Park Sungjin, you are everything but – you’re kind, you’re pure, you are his happiness. He has always made sure to remind you of this when others get to you; he reminds you that no matter how hot-headed you may seem to be, you will always be the one to make his day shine a little brighter. 

It is why he calls you sunshine. 

However, for tonight, he might just start to take his words back. 

“You owe me an explanation,” you voice out, and Sungjin nods his head slightly, taking a step towards you. You peer your eyes at him, mustering the vanished anger in an attempt for him to see how mad you truly are, even if it is to little avail. He keeps stepping forward without hesitation.

“I want answers.”

Another step.

“Sungjin, I’m not kidding.”

Another step.

“Park Sungjin, you little sh – “ 

Sungjin stops directly in front of you, his face barely an inch away from yours. He playfully pokes your nose with his own, before leaning his forehead against yours. 

“The sky’s pretty tonight; almost as gorgeous as you are. Let’s go for a walk.”

You grumble in annoyance; flattery has always been Sungjin’s go-to escape route when it comes to avoiding your temper. 

“Compliments won’t work. And I want you to tell me what the hell is going on first.”

“I’ll tell you as we walk. I promise.”

“Sungjin, I’m not going anywhere until you tell me what’s going on.”

“Just take a walk with me please; it’s my birthday.”

He pouts, staring into your eyes with a longing expression. It’s hard to evade eye contact when the boy is within such close proximity, and as hard as you try to remain unfazed, you can slowly feel yourself melt under his gaze. 

Damn those bloody eyes. 

“Technically, it’s not your birthday just yet,” you speak, sighing in an exaggerated manner as you finally admit defeat. “But, alright. As long as you promise to stop keeping me in the dark.”

“I promise you’ll find everything out before midnight.” 

He grins, taking a step back before intertwining your fingers together. “Remember the arcade where we had our first date? It’s only a few blocks away. Why don’t we head there for a bit?”

“Sungjin, the arcade’s part of a complex – it’s well closed by now.”

“Then we’ll just stand outside. Come on.”

He tugs at your hand, and you begrudgingly walk beside him on the sidewalk; your fingers remain intertwined underneath the stars as Park Sungjin leads you into the night. Unbeknownst to you, Park Sungjin silently prays to the sky with every step you both take that his plan for tonight will be written in the stars.


	5. Chapter 5

The day Park Sungjin finally asked you out, you expected him to take you to the nearest restaurant he could find; after getting closer to him over the course of the next few months, both of you using the talent showcase as an excuse to simply be near each other all the time, you’d gradually realised that he kept everything aside from the band as far away from the spotlight as he could. Even your rendezvous with each other for the showcase remained private, always meeting after school and being too shy to greet each other in the public eye. Park Sungjin likes to keep things as private as he can, and you accept that. It is simply who he is.

Therefore, after months of excruciatingly waiting for the boy to finally ask you out as you were too stubborn to do so yourself, you didn’t have the slightest doubt that he would keep things as simple as he could; and he did – just with a slightly different approach.  
On your first date, Park Sungjin took you to the arcade.   
The arcade was located outside the small complex, a building not big enough to be deemed as a mall, but somehow managed to provide all the facilities needed, including a hundred-year-old entertainment venue. The complex in itself has been around since before you were born, but you’d never made an attempt to even step foot into the arcade as you simply never found yourself to be interested.

And yet, it officially became your first date spot with Sungjin. 

When he first announced the destination of your date in the car, you’d been at a loss for words. You didn’t necessarily mind it, as being with Sungjin was the only requirement you had, and that one had been successfully checked off the list; but arcades tend to be loud, and filled to the brim with kids and other teenagers – it is very much a place for the public, even some of your schoolmates headed there from time-to-time, and therefore it is very much a contrast to the quiet personality that Park Sungjin continues to uphold. 

But he seemed all too excited about it, having spent the entire drive grinning fidgeting in his seat, so you obliged and said nothing. It was nice to see Sungjin so happy.

The fact that you were part of it just made it all the more worthwhile.

When you reached the arcade, the venue was as packed as you expected, and the neon lights that brightened an initially dark room blinded your vision temporarily, causing you to blink rapidly to adjust to the lights. When the blindness subsided, you closed your eyes momentarily and opened them again to see a sparkly-eyed boy stare at you with a look of concern all over his features. 

“Are you okay?”

You smiled reassuringly. “I’m fine. It’s quite thrilling to be at the arcade, really.”

“Have you never been here before?”

You shook your head at his question, and Sungjin grumbled to himself; he mumbled words under his breath, and you could tell he was reprimanding himself for not checking in with you first. 

“Hey, don’t worry,” you assured, putting your hand on his shoulder. “Like I said, it’s thrilling. I’ve never been able to have fun at the arcade before; it’s a new experience.”

“I should’ve checked with you first. I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine, Sungjin. We’re here now, aren’t we? You might as well show me just how fun the arcade can be.”

You didn’t miss the pleased glint that appeared in Sungjin’s eyes; he hesitated at first, unmoving, looking down at your hands only mere inches from each other; not bothering to hide how amused you are, you chuckled and slowly intertwined your fingers with his, feeling the warmth of his hand that would soon become your solace within the years to come. He lifted his gaze and grinned at you, before slowly dragging you further into the arcade, not missing a beat as he began listing down the variety of games the place provided.

“There’s air hockey, which Dowoon is particularly obsessed with; there’s pinball, which Jae claims to be an expert at although he honestly sucks – oh, they also have the Ms. Pac-Man machine and guess who is the proud owner of the highest score on the board?”

“I’m guessing you, Sungjin.”

“Correct.” He chuckled, eyes roaming over every single gaming machine, a hint of nostalgia glossed over them. The sparkle in his eyes appeared brighter, that distinct glint never fading, and you realised something in the moment; this place means more to him than he’d care to admit. 

“You.. you really love this place, don’t you?” you asked, never taking your eyes off of his. His cheeks reddened at your words, a dead giveaway that you’d just created a crack in his walls, though you weren’t sure why he would be extremely embarrassed. 

“Yeah, I do.” He sighed, running his other hand through his hair; you’d come to realise that it is an act he does whenever he’s overwhelmed with emotion, particularly when he’s nervous. “It’s just – growing up, before the band, this is the one place I would feel.. content. My father worked late hours, and my mum used to work part-time in this very building; so usually while waiting for her to get off work so we could finally go home, I’d end up here. And I loved it. Don’t get me wrong, the overwhelming number of people could sometimes be incredibly suffocating – but just being able to enjoy myself in this arcade, trying out every single game imaginable, playing relentlessly until I managed to beat the highest score of every machine; it just made me happy.” 

You listened to his words intently, feeling your heart slowly melt at his story. Park Sungjin had been closed off for months; despite the number of times you’d hung out prior to your first date, he never once shared anything private with you. He simply never even cared to, and you never had the guts to ask anything beyond the names and number of family members.   
Right there, in the middle of a busy arcade, Park Sungjin told you a personal story, and it successfully created a crack in your own walls. 

The silence that followed his words must have been deafening, because Sungjin cleared his throat after a few moments, averting his gaze away from yours. 

“Sorry. I shouldn’t have sprung that on you on the first date.”

“No, don’t – I mean, it’s okay. It’s great, really. I didn’t know anything personal about you. Your story is – it’s really sweet. Thank you for telling me.”

Sungjin nodded subtly, still refusing to meet your eyes again as his cheeks remained a deep shade of red. You silently snickered at how endearing the whole situation was, realising just how much you loved relishing in the moment.

Being with Sungjin may very well be better than being under the spotlight. 

“So, what do you want to try out first?” he asked, and you shrugged indecisively.

“Honestly, I have no clue. I don’t really know much about arcade games.”

“Well, then – “

His eyes scanned the room once again, trying to find the perfect game to commence your first experience in an arcade – when they finally landed on the merchandiser just a few feet away. He turned towards you then, his prior embarrassment managing to fade in an instant as he dragged you towards the machine.

“The claw machine?” you questioned, looking through the glass as you took in the several wrapped gifts, anonymous prizes of different variations inside. “Not that I mind, Sungjin – but this seems more like a one-person game.”

“Not if you add a twist to it.”

“A twist?”

“A bet of sorts. Whoever manages to get a prize out first has to pay for lunch.”

You raised an eyebrow at him jokingly, bemused by the sudden surge of competitiveness that had surfaced. 

The inexplicable feeling of being challenged itself had also come knocking at your door. 

He gulped. “Uh, I mean – it’s only chivalrous for the boy to pay on the first – “

“Screw that; I’m in.”

A grin crept onto your date’s face. “Alright, then. I’ll go buy some tokens.”

\- - - 

You’d only ever seen the merchandiser be operated in movies before, and you often believed that the sheer difficulty of retrieving a prize had simply been exaggerated on the silver screen; a way of adding pure comedic effect to enlighten a heavy plot.

That is, until you got your hands on the damn machine itself.

You and Sungjin took turns on the claw machine, trying to snag the closest prize that you could; every time you thought you’d managed to attach the claw to an item, it would release the damn object from its grasp the minute you tried to move it towards the opening in the corner. Even Park Sungjin, the man who claimed to have bested every single machine in the premises, had a difficult time trying to retrieve a prize – and he was angry because of it. You could hear the silent curses he mumbled under his breath, and it truly astounded you to see this side of him; the competitive side that had been cultivated after years of spending his childhood underneath neon lights, challenging himself to every single arcade game imaginable. 

It was more amusing than anything, really. You couldn’t say much about it yourself, considering your competitive streak was on par with his, if not worse. 

“Yes! Holy shit, yes!”

The enthusiastic shrieks coming from beside you made you snap out of your train of thought; you’d been preoccupied with your new discovery of Sungjin’s hidden personality trait that you hadn’t observed him patiently moving the joystick, aiming the claw at a small box just a few inches from the opening in the machine; as you were distracted, Sungjin had managed to successfully grip the small box between the claws, silently moving it towards the opening, careful not to miss a single beat –

You’d come back to reality just in time to see the prize drop into the opening, dispensing through the chute and into the hatchet for collection. 

“No.”

“Oh, yes.” Sungjin skipped in place and clapped his hands together in an adorable manner, as if he were a kid that had just been given mountains of candy. With an elated squeal, he reached into the hatchet and slowly took out his newfound prized possession, eyes sparkling so brightly that even the neon lights couldn’t compare. 

“To be fair, you’ve had years of experience before me; the odds were stacked against me from the beginning,” you complained, trying hard to conceal the smirk that made its way onto your lips. It was more than evident that you were simply messing around, and Sungjin chuckled as you sneered at him.

“You’re cute when you’re mad; but I must say you have a point. It isn’t fair that you only had beginner’s luck on your side. So, as a way of calling things even – “   
Sungjin placed the wrapped box in your palm, and you raised an eyebrow at him, bewildered as to what he’s implying.

“My gift to you,” he spoke, eyes lingering on the small box before he lifts his gaze to meet yours. “As an apology, and a thank you for today.”

“The day hasn’t even ended – “ 

“I know, but you could’ve easily left the minute I brought you here, to this old ass arcade that people still come to simply because there’s nothing else to do in this small ass town. But you didn’t, and I’m really glad you’re here right now. So, thank you.” 

You smiled warmly at the boy in front of you, touched by his words of gratitude. “To be honest, Sungjin, anyone who walks out on a date simply because they are unfamiliar with the venue is pretty shitty; but just so you know, I’m having a great time. And I’m glad it’s with you.”

Silence hung in the air with your words as both your faces turned red, feeling embarrassed for the nth time that day. The date wasn’t even halfway through yet; you wondered if you both could keep up with the rest of the day without full-on turning into a shade firefighters should be driving in.

“Open it,” Sungjin breathed, motioning to the box. “We might as well see my first gift to you is.”

You chuckled, shaking your head at his words as you tore into the wrapping paper. You carefully opened the white box, peering inside to see its contents. 

“It’s a ring,” you announced, and you lifted your gaze to see Sungjin’s face redden to an even bolder shade.

“A-a what?”

“Plastic ring,” you specified, taking it out to inspect the prize. It was a plastic green ring, a shade almost similar to that of an emerald, with a flower at its centre where a gem would typically be. “It’s cute; I like it.”  
You slipped the ring onto your finger, before turning your hand around and wiggling your fingers to show Sungjin the prize; he chuckled at the sight, though he was still utterly red in the face. 

“Not worth the dozens of tokens, to be honest.”

“Maybe, but I’d say you’ve gained your money’s worth in terms of pride.”

Sungjin bit his lip, shaking his head at your words. If you could read his thoughts back then, you’d know that he’d just internally admitted to himself that this was the best date he’d ever been on, and it had barely even begun – but he’d expected this, of course. After all, Sungjin came to the arcade to make himself happy; he wouldn’t have brought along someone who could make him feel anything but. 

“Should you buy me lunch now?” he teased, and you rolled your eyes at the sudden request.

“It’s only been one game, Sungjin; I want to try out the others too. How about we try a round of air hockey – but with a twist.”

“A twist?”

“Another bet – double or nothing. Loser has to pay for lunch today, and the meal on our second date.”

“There – there’s going to be a second date?” 

Sungjin eyed you with a smirk playfully placed on his lips, and you gulped as your own words began to hit you. “Uh, I mean – “ 

“Screw it; I’m in.”


	6. Chapter 6

The neon lights have come to a dim now that the complex has closed for the day. As you stand next to Sungjin on the pavement, metres away from the entertainment venue, you reminisce on all the times you two have spent hanging out at the arcade – the endless bets, competitions, witty banter – all of it brought you two closer together. And up until senior year, the place became one of your usual date spots; but then college rolled around, and life came after – with Sungjin and the boys having spent life after high school kick-starting their fame as a band and you staying put in town for college, there was simply no more time to spend playing games at the arcade. 

“Do you remember this place?” Sungjin asks, his eyes sparkling at the sight of his once-second home; he squeezes your hand as the familiar glint appears in his eyes, just as it did on your first date all those years ago. You bask in the warmth of his hand, relishing in your solace, and how you’ve missed it so. 

The boys would be heading back to the city in a few days; Jae, Brian and Sungjin had come directly to town after their concert in Japan; only Wonpil and Dowoon had decided to stay behind a couple days, hence the number of delayed flights; but the thought of Sungjin having to leave you again after two weeks of being home made your insides squirm. It has been hard enough dealing with the long distance as it is – back then more than now – and you yourself would be moving into the city in a number of months to be closer to the love of your life, but imagining the dreadful miles that would stand within your way again – 

You squeeze his hand tighter; all of that can be dealt with when they’re gone. For now, for tonight, you are home. 

“Yes,” you answer, closing your eyes as the memories come back to you. “I remember every single memory; God, we spent so much bloody time here, didn’t we?”

“From the very first date, up till senior year. Who would have known my introducing you to the arcade would make it your favourite thing in the world?”

“Not – not my favourite.” You drift your gaze over to the boy beside you, who has been staring at you with his heart’s content. “It was a genuinely good first date, though.”

“It was. I actually – “ 

“I completely crushed you at air hockey.”

“I wouldn’t say “crushed,” per se, more like – “

“Crushed. Destroyed. Obliterated. Take your pick, boy.”

“Fine.” Sungjin laughed, and your heart melted for the nth time at how truly adorable he is. “I still take pride in winning you that ring, though.”

“I can’t believe I lost it.” You groaned, recalling a much bitter memory this time; you’d had the ring on your finger since the day you and Sungjin finally decided to become official, and for two years it remained on your person, a beautiful reminder of the start of something even more breath-taking; but you’d come to lose it while on vacation at the beach, despite the tremendous efforts and hours of poking through the sand in an attempt to find a minuscular object you’d been so damn stupid enough to drop. You spent the rest of the vacation on the brink of tears, until you arrived home and had Sungjin comforting you in his arms, assuring you it was okay. 

“I can’t believe how much money I spent on plastic jewellery.”

You roll your eyes, taking your hand out of your boyfriend’s grasp and playfully slapping him, causing another boisterous laugh to ring through the night. “I loved that damn ring, just so you know.”

“I know you did. In fact, it’s incredibly sweet how much you truly loved it.”

“That ring was my whole world – wrapped in poor-quality wrapping paper.”

Sungjin chuckles, slowly reaching out to wrap his arms around your waist, pulling you closer before burying his face in your hair.

“I’ve got my whole world right here,” he mumbles, and you roll your eyes again, trying to ignore the warmth that radiates off of him that leaves your heart in a permanent melted state; how exactly again are you the sunshine in this relationship? 

“I still like the ring better,” you joke, and Sungjin pulls away, poking his tongue out at you. 

“Yeah well, you’ll be saying otherwise by midnight.”

“What – “

“Hey, isn’t your old apartment a couple of blocks away from here? How about we stop by there next?” Sungjin suggests, and you scrunch your eyebrows at his sudden change in topic, the past few hours suddenly coming back to you.

“You’re forgetting I want answers,” you say, crossing your arms over your chest. “Will you tell me when exactly I’m getting them.”

“At midnight,” he answers, placing his hands into the pockets of his jacket. “You’ll get them at midnight – I promise.”

“Why can’t you just tell me now? I want answers now.”

“Because – well, that’s – it’s just less than two hours. Please wait, I swear I’ll tell you then.”

“Sungjin, you know how much I fucking hate that apartment.”

“No, you hate the memories there.”

“What’s the difference? Every time I even think about that apartment I end up distressed. Why do we have to go there?”

“Please, sunshine. It’s my birthday.”

The birthday boy pouts at you, widening his eyes in an attempt to get you to oblige; you avert your gaze, knowing full effect those eyes have on you, yet the several attempts of resisting them continue to prove futile, especially during tonight of all nights. 

“You hate bloody birthdays. You shouldn’t be using them as an excuse,” you mumble, and Sungjin grins as he interlocks your fingers again, evidently happy that he got you to concede. 

“Correction; I hate celebrating my birthday. Using it as an excuse to get my girlfriend to go along with whatever the hell I’m up to is proving to be a useful perk.” 

You playfully slap him again with your other hand, and the birthday boy grins, pecking your cheek before he drags you yet again to another distinct location; it is less than two hours before midnight, and you’re still left wondering just what sort of surprise Sungjin has in store.


	7. Chapter 7

A lot of our memories can be pinpointed to a certain place in time. There are the ones we cherish; the ones we remember behind closed eyelids with a smile and a heart full of content. Then there are the ones better left forgotten; the ones that show up in our minds unannounced, replaying in our heads like a film sequence with no signs of stopping, until they finally, and we are left a mess from being unexpectedly haunted by the ghosts our past. 

For you, your best and worst memories are pinpointed to certain locations – your parents’ home, where you were raised and loved; your old high school, where you spent your youth in the best ways you believe capable; the arcade, where you can always stare at your boyfriend’s smile; the local park, where Sungjin first told you he loved you. It was these little moments that continue to shine a light in your life as you look back, and remain grateful for all you’ve been given.

But every light has its shadow; your worst memories remain buried in the back of your mind, pinpointed to one specific location; a place you try best to avoid in order to keep those nightmares hidden, as thinking back to those times cause you nothing but distress and sorrow. 

Your old apartment is the source of most moments you wish to forget; it was where you and Sungjin almost broke apart. 

The worst of the worst had occurred in your second year of college, but the first step had been taken after senior year, over two years into your relationship with your high-school sweetheart; the band had been signed just some time before high school graduation, and back then you were nothing but ecstatic and proud of your boys; you’d always known their talent was meant for more than the mere attention of a secluded town – they deserved to have the spotlight shone down upon them on a global scale, and if such an opportunity has decided to come greet them, then it would be utter idiocy to not open the door for a once-in-a-lifetime chance.

But Park Sungjin had hesitated. Because striving for worldwide recognition meant leaving the small town in exchange for the big city; it meant leaving behind his family, his friends, his happy place; it meant leaving you. 

And that thought scared him most. 

The band had tried to convince him that everything would be fine, that they would work hard and persevere to make it to the top, and that you would still be around to cheer on them from the side lines. In fact, they were perhaps more convinced than you were that everything would fall perfectly into place. 

“Your futures are permanently aligned, my dear leader – nothing could keep you two apart.” Jae’s words were that of a sweet young boy trying best to convince his best friend to pursue the dream they’ve shared for years by his side; he repeated them like a mantra up until the last day of accepting the offer came, but even then Park Sungjin remained in doubt. 

It had to be your words that gave him that one final push. 

He’d called you an hour before the offer was officially off the table, panicking out of his goddamn mind, wondering what the hell he should choose.  
“I don’t want to leave you.” His whispers were barely intelligible on call, but you heard his concerns loud and clear; he’d voiced them to you several times over the past few weeks, but every advice you’d given had simply fallen on deaf ears.

“Sungjin, this is an incredible opportunity. Please don’t waste it because of me.”

“I know it is; God, I know it is. And I want to accept it, I really do. But then I remember you – “

“Sungjin, this kind of opportunity only comes once in a lifetime.”

“Maybe you only come once in a lifetime.”

His words left you in silence, tears stinging in your eyes as the thought of Park Sungjin actually leaving finally dawned on you. It would take so much to get used to – his absence meant less laughter, less smiles, one less place to come home to. 

Without his warmth, you would be left in the cold.  
But you couldn’t think like that; this wasn’t about you, and this wasn’t about your relationship. This was about him and the band, and their whole future was on the line.

“Sungjin, we will be okay,” you assured, trying best to convince him – and yourself. “We can get through anything, you know that. Trust me, once I’ve started college and you’re out there leading the band in search of the spotlight, everything will seem like a dream. Remember what Jae said; our futures are permanently aligned. There is nothing that could keep us apart."

You could practically hear the gears turning in his head on the other end of the line, seemingly contemplating your words in a way he hadn’t all the times prior. Getting through to him made you satisfied, so much so that you managed to ignore the crack in your heart that had begun to form.

“Are you sure, sunshine?”

“I am – more than anything.”

Silence. Eerie, deafening silence as the gears continued to turn. 

“Alright then,” he said at last, and you didn’t miss the slight squeal in his voice that made your heart melt. “I’ll do it – I’ll say yes. Fuck, I can’t believe I’m actually saying yes. This is incredible. Thank you so much for convincing me; I love you so much, sunshine.”

“I love you, too.” This time, it was your voice that came out barely intelligible, as you tried your best to ignore the walls crumbling down on you. “Now, go give the agency a call. They’re not going to wait forever.”

“Right; shoot, you’re right. I have to go.” You could hear the panic in his voice that had suddenly reappeared, and you laughed silently at how adorable the boy you loved truly was. 

To have him leave you behind would be the biggest challenge you would ever have to face. 

“Oh, and sunshine?” Sungjin said into the phone, and you snapped back to reality in surprise, not realising he hadn’t ended the call.

“What is it, Sungjin?”

“The spotlight means nothing to me – you know that. No matter what I’ll be searching for, please know that I’ve already found my dream come true.”

Park Sungjin hung up the call, and tear slid down your cheek. 

This was it. He was truly leaving. He was leaving you behind, and the future was unknown. 

You closed your eyes to stop the tears flowing, picturing the imagery of eyes encapsulating a starry night sky – the sound of Park Jaehyung’s voice began ringing in your ears, his words trying best to convince you that everything would be just fine. 

Park Sungjin told you that night that his dream had already come true; and you prayed to the heavens every night for the next two years, that yours would soon come back to you. 

\- - -

The beginnings of long-distance relationships have always been known to be the hardest, but the opposite could be said for you and Sungjin. 

It was evidently hard to see him leave, but you articulated most of the emotions pent up inside into a sense of pride rather than mere regret; the band had started off by busking in well-known spots around the city, drawing eyes in the form of crowds as pedestrians awed over their talent. It didn’t take as long as expected for the boys to gain a small following outside of their hometown, and everyone – the agency, the band, even you yourself – were more than ecstatic over the first leap, knowing that over time the nation would slowly open its eyes to the tremendous talent possessed by five boys who loved music more than anything. As the band took to the streets, you had begun your first semester at college, studying long nights in order to pursue your own dreams. You kept your grades high from the very first examination, and over the years your name would be no mere stranger on the dean’s list. 

Sungjin had always managed to express just how proud he is of you, and you never failed to do the same; during the first year of separation, you two had become equally busy in your own fields, but there was always a persistence to make time for each other; video calls and lonely nights were your saviour, keeping distance as nothing more than simply total miles apart. It wasn’t the same as being the sunshine enveloped in his warmth, but you made do with what you could. 

On some nights, you would feel cold, shivers running down your spine as the absence of a sparkly-eyed boy overwhelmed you, sometimes even leaving you in tears as you longed for the sense of warmth that no one else could give; but his few hometown visits helped you get through it, so much so that you’d perhaps grown more dependent on them than the near-daily calls. Sungjin always made a point to come visit as much as he can, spending the day with his parents before enveloping you in his arms for the majority of the night. There were months where he couldn’t make it home, and you were yet again left in the cold, but you knew better than to be too distraught – he was working hard to chase his dreams, and you’d been the one to push him on the journey. You would gain nothing by drowning yourself in your loneliness; it was better to remain optimistic and supportive from the side-lines. At the very least, Park Sungjin always managed to make it home for all the special occasions – your anniversary, your birthday, even his own birthday which he continues to refuse to celebrate. 

Like Park Jaehyung said, your futures will always remain aligned. There was simply nothing to worry about – for the most part, everything that occurred truly did seem like a dream come true. 

But dreams can only last for so long; when the first year had rolled around and the second year had come to take its place, you found yourself dealing with a reality check that left you fully awake. 

As most things goes, it started and ended with time – sooner than you’d expected, the band began gaining fame, and with that came the consequence of more working hours and less free nights. All the members would be busking and practising after sunrise, and crammed inside a practice room from the evening until just before dawn, trying to get in as much song writing as they could; the only free time the frontman had was the few hours he would be allowed to sleep, which left him little to no time to contact you. At first, you dealt with it – you knew that being too busy for relationships came as a package with wanting to be a musician, but you were adamant about not being part of the curse, and so you did as best you could to not let the drift get between you. Park Sungjin was chasing his dreams, and you were chasing yours – the present had not been in your favour, but you were certain that the future would. You just had to be patient. 

But you felt cold. You felt really, really cold. 

Time was your hope, but it was also your biggest enemy – after a while the lack of interaction got too much, and the less time you were given to communicate with Sungjin, the more distant you felt with him. It got to the point where you could barely remember what he looked like; his features remained a vague blur, and the reminder that you were unable to picture your boyfriend’s current appearance made your stomach twist, so you decided to stop trying altogether. The pictures you had of him were all candids from the past, ones you’d taken in secret because Sungjin was never one for the camera – being too shy to take even a selfie meant that he never sent you current photos of himself, and you were left in question and emotional distraught. The only features that remained with you were his eyes, the very last hope for salvation you had. 

And yet, that single silver lining just simply wasn’t enough. A concoction of distance and time spent apart is lethal, and the more you create it, the more it leaves you lost and uncertain; with the days gone by, the emotions in you started to fade, replaced with school and friends and the new apartment that you’d moved into the summer before sophomore year. You’d created a sole universe within the confines of your small town; a sole universe with Sungjin as a minor character, never truly around, but remaining a part of the story nonetheless. 

The few video calls and lonely nights had become more your ruin than your saviour – the rare moments you got just reminded you how much you hated missing him; you hated missing your high school years, you hated missing his eyes, you hated being so fucking cold all the damn time because you couldn’t feel his warmth. Those hometown visits you’d previously depended on were now a rare sight – you saw him only a few times in the past year, and even then you could barely spend any time together, as his schedule prevented him from staying even a single night away from the city. He was missing your calls, he was missing hometown visits – he was missing the special occasions. Your birthday had come and gone by with a mere text and a five-minute video call, as the band had been holding a concert overseas, and time zones had gotten in the way; your anniversary came and went as well, with no more than an hour visit as he’d rushed to town to see you before hopping on a plane to another country that very night. 

Little by little, the significance of the special occasions seemed lost on Sungjin; you knew he couldn’t do much about it – he was under a contract, he had a job he loved and wanted to succeed in; he was searching for a spotlight big enough for a global scale, and in order to do so he needed all the support and patience from the side-lines he could get. 

You had been supportive. And you had been patient. For the past two years, you’d kept it pent up inside – you’d tried not letting the loneliness get to you, and you’d tried not to fall into the curse; but one can only hold on to so much when time remained an unbeaten enemy. 

It was so cold. It was so, so cold. 

And when Park Sungjin didn’t show up to chicken and beer on the night of his birthday, that was the final straw.


	8. Chapter 8

It was the fact that he promised – that was what hurt you most. 

After having spent barely any time celebrating your four-year anniversary, Park Sungjin had made a declaration to you before you left that he would find the time to come back on his birthday, and that you both would spend the entire day together – just the two of you and no else, embracing and basking in each other’s presence, with no other distractions. When he said this, you’d been sceptical – hell, you downright told him that he would more than likely not even make it back – but Sungjin was adamant that he would keep his word. He told you to wait a few months for his return; he swore to you that nothing could get in the way of you being in his arms at the stroke of midnight, January 16th. 

“The company is allowing us a one-day vacation on each member’s birthday. I swear to you, sunshine, I will be home. We can eat chicken and beer, just like all those years ago. We can even fucking celebrate my birthday if you want to. Just wait for me, and I’ll be home. I promise.”

You believed him. You truly did; Park Sungjin has never been able to lie to you. He could never lie to you.

At least, not until then. 

But you were oblivious to the fact at the time, so for the next few months, leading up to Park Sungjin’s birthday, you grew more and more excited; you had spent almost a year without celebrating special occasions, and the fact that he was willing to celebrate his birthday that year just made you all the more eager; slowly but surely, the video calls and long nights that would leave you in distress reminded you simply that Sungjin would soon be back in your arms, and that almost everything you’ve had pent up inside could finally be let go; if you couldn’t say it to his face, then you could bask in his warmth until the cold melted away. That was more than enough. 

Your dream come true was finally ready to come back to you. It almost seemed too good to be true.

And it was. 

On the night of Park Sungjin’s birthday, you had waited in the corner of the familiar chicken and beer restaurant at the time you’d agreed to meet, precisely two hours before midnight; your heart was racing with anticipation, barely able to contain the ecstasy trying to implode within you as the image of Park Sungjin’s eyes came to mind – you would soon be able to see them in person again, this time up close and for more hours on end. The idea of finally being able to celebrate Sungjin’s birthday also made your heart leap, and you eagerly brushed your fingers against the wrapped gift you’d prepared for him, having spent more than a few dozen tokens at the arcade in order to get it. 

It was an anonymous prize from the clawing machine; you had no clue as to what was inside, as you wanted it to be a surprise for you both, but the gift came more in the form of nostalgia rather than a physical object; you thought that having a little something from his second home to take back to the city would remind him of his roots – remind him of you. It was his old world wrapped in a single gift, and you knew that he would love it. 

At least, you hoped he would. But over the past years, as time won every demanding battle, you were barely convinced yourself if the Park Sungjin you once knew was still the same person anymore. 

So when the clock ticked by and over an hour had past with you sitting alone at a table for two, the doubts had come to greet you. You waited and you waited; the incontrollable excitement had reduced to that of painful agony as you longed for Sungjin to walk through the door and melt the worries away. You were wishing it was a prank – one that may have been diabolically suggested by a mischievous pair – and that your boyfriend would come running into the restaurant just before the stroke of midnight, laughing gleefully at the sight of you and bragging about how he managed to pull off such a glorious surprise. Even if it seemed like a wish too cruel, it was better than believing that Sungjin had left you hanging after months on end of telling you to anticipate his return.

There was fifteen minutes left till midnight. The tears flowed before you’d even realised. 

You clutched the wrapped gift in your hands, trying to make sense as to why the hell Park Sungjin had lied to you. It’s not like you didn’t try to win over your doubts – you called him, over and over; you left more than a dozen messages; the ones in the beginning filled with words of worry and concern before they slowly progressed to include more obscene profanities. He never answered to either, and you were left feeling a concoction of different emotions as you tried making another call, only to find that your phone had died. 

You were mad – you were beyond fucking mad – but more than that, you were hurt. You were so goddamn hurt.

Never before had you ever felt that Park Sungjin would purposely leave a crack in your heart that couldn’t healed. But there you were, in the same place that you’d celebrated his birthday for the past four years, and he was nowhere to be seen. Any means to contact him further would just be worthless – you were tired enough as it is.

For the first time in the past two years, you admitted to yourself that perhaps it was all just a little too much. 

There was five minutes left till midnight. There was simply no longer a point. 

With tears that persisted on flowing despite your dire resistance, you got up from your seat and bent your head down, trying best to ensure that no one else could see how pathetic you were. You didn’t miss the few stares from the customers and waiters who’d witnessed your sorrow, and before anyone could even say a word, you bolted out the restaurant and into the winter breeze, feeling the cold wind hit you as you stepped foot outside the door. 

You held your coat tighter around you, shivering as you stood in place, barely even sure if you could manage the short distance to your car. You looked up then to see the sky blinking down on you – it was a particularly starry night, stars shining brightest it ever had throughout the whole of winter, and you wondered if the universe itself had decided to celebrate the birthday of a boy whom your sole remembrance was of his eyes. 

The boy who ditched you on his birthday without even explaining why. The boy who left you worried, distressed, frustrated, heartbroken. All at once. 

It was officially midnight. You closed your eyes as another tear flowed through, trying best not to let the coldness of the winter breeze get to you.

You fucking hated the goddamn cold. 

“Happy birthday, Park Sungjin,” you whispered, giving the sky one final glance before you turned in the direction of your car. “I’m sorry I’m not in your arms.”

Without another word, you headed down the sidewalk until you spotted your car; you got in the vehicle and drove home, leaving the winter breeze to be accompanied by a starry night sky. 

You didn’t realise that you had left Park Sungjin’s gift back at the restaurant. 

\- - -

Crying your eyes out on the kitchen floor with a bottle of wine clutched in hand wasn’t the way you planned on ending the night, but it was what you got. 

It was two hours into his birthday, and you had stayed put in the exact same spot from the minute you arrived home, leaning against the kitchen cabinet with your head between your knees as you soaked the front of your skirt with your tears. You paused every now and then to take a swig of alcohol, unnerved as the liquid burned your throat simply because you already felt numb all over. 

You’d charged your phone to see if he had contacted you. The asshole hadn’t, and you were left an even bigger mess. 

The bottle was half empty as the two hours ticked by with a blur, time seeming to have moved at a much faster pace than it did just a few hours ago. You were determined to no longer step foot in the restaurant, despite being a loyal customer for years, simply because you knew the awful memory of running outside in tears would just come back to haunt you. A bitter memory attached to a specific location was just best left forgotten. 

Another swig as your sobs momentarily died down. You believed that if you could see yourself in the mirror, you wouldn’t even be able to recognise who you were; the girl who stood tall, fierce, intimidating the rest by being elected student body president in sophomore year; the girl who loved being challenged, who never backed down from a fight, who spent her adolescence falling in love and witnessing her dreams come true – 

For a moment in time, that girl was lost. Another older version of her was barely keeping things together, gradually becoming more wasted with every sip of alcohol down the hatchet, trying to forget the fact that for the first time in four years, her boyfriend had broken a promise he swore to keep. It was a sympathetic sight; a damsel in distress sitting in the dark as her emotions flowed through her tears, the wine coursing through her only rendering her control system useless. 

Just as you had back at the restaurant, you felt many different emotions at once. You felt pathetic, because you had never been a mere damsel in distress, and bawling in the middle of the night was far from being your forte; you felt vulnerable from the alcohol, realising that you may have taken one too many swigs; you felt numb from the cold winter, not having the heart to get up from your spot and turn on the heater. 

But more so than anything, you felt alone. You’d never felt more alone than you did right then, and neither had the girl who was temporarily missing, waiting to be found. 

Waiting. You were so fucking tired of waiting. 

Our worst memories can be pinpointed to a specific location or time; for you, having to sit in the dark on a cold-tiled floor, tears continuing to flow through as you drowned the remainder of the bottle in your hand in order to forget the loneliness that you’d cultivated for the past two years, it was when you’d finally admitted to yourself that you’d hit rock bottom. 

And that was the worst memory you would ever create. 

In an attempt to drag yourself into bed, you slowly clutched onto the handles of the cabinet you’d leaned on, hoping you’d be able to force yourself up despite being utterly drunk out of your mind. Your vision was blurry from the tears and your head was in immense pain; it wasn’t even a surprise that you only managed to fall to the floor again, sighing in frustration at not being able to do such a simple task. 

The inexplicable feeling of being challenged overwhelmed your drunken state. Slowly but surely, you began your next attempt, reaching your hands out for the handles –

When a knock came at the door. 

You panicked, suddenly on alert, albeit in a drunken manner as you reached for the empty bottle previously discarded on the floor instead, wondering who the hell would show up to your door at half past two in the morning. 

It seemed like alcohol could render you with complete absence of a shred of common sense. 

Several knocks came. You weren’t sure who this idiot was, but they seemed very persistent in trying to get in. 

You lay low on the kitchen floor and stayed silent, hoping the person would eventually walk away upon guessing that you were sleeping – as you should be. 

One final knock, and then a long pause. You figured whoever the stranger was had gone off, and you momentarily forgot about your sorrows as a sense of relief washed over you, grateful that you didn’t have to deal with anyone in the state you were in –

The door opened. And in walked a man with a freshly shaven buzz-cut, a small box in one hand and a bunch of keys in the other, eyes glistening even in the darkness as they dotted around the apartment in a frenzy, searching for the source of their shine that remained hidden behind the kitchen cabinet, shocked beyond imagine at the sight of the boy that appeared at her door. 

“Sunshine, I’m so sorry.”


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The heaviest chapter yet. And one of my favourites that I've ever written.

The rare few visits Park Sungjin had successfully made to the old apartment had been brief and spontaneous, each one of them a fast-moving sequence that you can barely remember. There was no need for light as you led him to the bedroom from the moment you would step inside, giving him no time to even process the interior. He would need to leave for the city before sunrise, sometimes before you were even awake, and you’d given him the key to your apartment at first as a sign of love and affection, as most couples do, but overtime it became a matter of convenience. You could count the number of times he’d even stepped foot in your apartment on a single hand; he hadn’t used the key even once, it was truly a surprise he even remembered he had it. 

Sungjin left the door slightly open behind him, taking another step into the apartment as he called your name, still having no clue that you crouched on the kitchen floor. He must have presumed that you were asleep – as you should be, it was almost three fucking a.m. – but he called your name out again regardless, perhaps hoping to awake you. He dragged his hands across the walls adjacent to the door, trying to find the light switch. In your drunken state of mind, you had watched his every movement in bliss, barely comprehending the fact that it was the boy you hadn’t seen in months almost directly in front of you. 

It was when you see him pause his hand inches above the switch that your mind appears to be on high alert again. 

You couldn’t let him see you like this. Fuck, he couldn’t see you like this. You were in a state of shattered glass, and having him look at you with those eyes right there and then would only crush you further. In a clumsy attempt to make a dash for your bedroom, this time to pull yourself together in a much different way, you hastily reached for the handles and finally managed to stand up straight. 

But you had somehow forgotten about ng from the hall. It shone upon you partially, one half of your body able to be perfectly seen. In a state of panic from the sudden realisation, you scurried back down to the floor, only to end up falling again as you tripped over your own two feet. The bottle you’d held in your hand dropped to the floor mid-fall, and a loud crash is heard as the bottle shattered to smithereens after colliding with the ground, barely an inch away from you. 

Fuck, the universe really hated you that night.

A shriek came in the distance as the sound of the bottle dropping resonated throughout the apartment; Park Sungjin hastily flipped the switch and light enveloped the room in sudden brightness, causing you to cover your face with your hands in an attempt to hide, though you knew very well that you’d been caught.

You couldn’t bear to see him look at you in such a state. 

Silence once again descended upon the room, so quiet even a pin dropping could be heard; you were more than assured that he had spotted you – he would be blind not to – which made the lack of sound all the more gut-wrenching. 

Why the hell is he not speaking?

Even though silence was a deadly thorn on your side, you kept your eyes closed, still not daring to take even a peek; on the off-chance that he was staring directly at you in shock and disbelief, you didn’t want to have to face him with how disheartened you looked. You wouldn’t be able to look at him then even if you were clean-cut and sober; not only were you an internally emotional mess, but to have Sungjin actually see you in such a vulnerable state , his eyes more than likely filled with so much pity and sorrow as he realised just how much the time being apart had affected you, gradually coming to the same conclusion that you had mere minutes ago that you were not as strong as initially deemed? All of that would just be too big of a humiliation to handle. 

Footsteps could be heard in the near distance. You gulped, still very much oblivious to his reaction.

Another step.

You could feel your heart beating in your chest as he made his way closer, the thought of being in close proximity making you dizzier than you already were; four years later, in a state as shattered as the wine bottle next you, this remained the lasting effect he had on you. 

Another step.

His warmth radiated the entire room; the heat that you had felt from the moment he stepped into the door grew warmer, and suddenly you no longer felt as numb as you had. 

Another step. 

He was crouched down directly in front of you as you leaned further into the cabinet, wishing you could disappear into the wall. Without warning, Sungjin delicately lifted your hands from your face; you resisted, trying to keep your devastating appearance but the damn boy was simply too strong, pulling your hands with little effort and tucking them into his own pair. 

Still, you kept your eyes closed. With such close proximity, you could hear Sungjin’s low sigh. Perhaps he was surprised at the state of you; perhaps he was expecting worse. Nevertheless, you didn’t care to find out. 

“Baby, please look at me.”

Your heart could fucking leap out of your chest right then with how fast it was beating; his words had slowly begun to melt away the coldness of the winter breeze, and he had yet to even explain himself. This boy had you wrapped around his little finger, and you hated it. 

Now that the efforts to remain hidden had gone with the breeze, you might as well get some bloody answers. 

You opened your eyes to the starry night sky. His hair had been shaved off, but he pulled it off well – of course he would – but his expression was much different than what you expected – rather than looking at you with pity, he appeared deathly concerned; his eyes were glistened over, a certain redness to them you rarely saw. 

He’d been crying. 

“Nice haircut,” you blurted, failing to keep your mouth shut in such a tense moment. You were too shocked to think of anything else – you’d been with Sungjin for four years. In all those times, he never cried once. To see his eyes bloodshot made you lose any ability to comprehend the situation in front of you. 

You blushed a deep shade of red as Park Sungjin pressed his lips into a thin line, for once not finding your embarrassment amusing. 

“It’s freezing in here,” he breathed, bringing your hands to his lips as he softly exhales on them, trying to provide the heat you’d been yearning for. “You must be cold. Where’s the heater again?”

You must be cold. 

Such simple words, but they brought back the events that transpired over the course of the night – Sungjin breaking his promise; Sungjin leaving you alone without so much as a call; Sungjin causing you so much distraught as to lie down on the cold-tiled floor with a now broken bottle of intoxicating liquid, wondering how he could possibly have the heart to lie to you. 

Sungjin got up and tried to search for the heater, ignoring the shattered bottle of wine next you. He was ignoring the topic – trying to divert your attention as best he can.. And that alone made your blood boil even more. 

“What happened?” you asked, trying to remain calm despite the fact that you’d conjured your anger as Sungjin decided not to address the elephant in the room. The birthday boy paused in his tracks, inexplicably surprised to find the tension being cut with a knife. He turned back to meet your gaze – but only the memories of tonight, as well as all the emotions you kept hidden for the past two years in your line of sight. The starry night sky that looked upon you was covered with a bold, infuriated red; it was hard to see much else. 

“I can explain.”

“Trust me, I expect you to.”

“Something important had come up, and – “ 

“So important you couldn’t even tell me over the phone?”

Sungjin winced at your words, clearly sensing the anger laced within them; all the previous sadness cultivated had been replaced with rage now that he was here, and you tried your best to maintain your composure, to keep seeing red, but the evident guilt on his face was keeping your heart from freezing over. 

“The company rejected our next single, and they want us to send in another song by the end of this week in order to meet our deadline. We found out this morning, and none of the songs we’d written were even close to being decent, so we had to start from scratch – “

“One phone call, Sungjin. All I needed was one fucking call.”

“I know, I know. But there’s a no-phone policy when we’re in the studio – “   
“So you’re telling me there was no way for you to contact me before your session began? Or during breaks? Or on your fucking ride here?”

“I – I just – I was going to call you, but I left my phone back at the dorm – “

“No, don’t – don’t you fucking dare lie to me, Park Sungjin.” You growled, the anger evident in your tone. You took a step back from the cabinet, almost stepping on shattered glass – Sungjin reached out in an attempt to pull you back, but the look you gave him made the asshole quickly retreat. “You can’t; you fucking can’t lie to me.”

“I –“ he hesitated, and you inhaled deeply to prevent from screaming. “I forgot. I’m sorry; I’m so, so sorry. When I found out our song got rejected, everything else came out the fucking window. It was all about the song, and nothing else. I remembered about our date the moment we finished the song; I drove here as fast as I could, and ended up leaving my phone behind. I’m sorry, sunshine – I’m so sorry.”

A tear meandered down your cheek without you even realising. You knew it was his responsibility as a musician to put his work first – you respected that, but the fact that he fucking forgot about your date made your walls crack. 

He forgot about the date – he forgot about you. You, the love of his life. You, the one who stood in the side-lines as he chased the spotlight. You, his dream come true. 

He had the fucking decency to forget you. 

“So I’m just that unimportant, aren’t I?” you whispered, barely audible to even your own ears, but Sungjin heard them loud and clear. “I just mean that fucking little to you now.”

“No, no –“ Sungjin panicked as he witnessed your tears flowing; he tried to reach out again, to pull you in his arms – but you took another step back, your bare feet almost stepping on the glass. 

You didn’t give a fuck even if you did. The pain inside was already so much worse  
.   
“Sunshine, please. You mean so much to me – you know that. It was one mistake, it was one mistake – please don’t cry, please. I’m so fucking sorry. I came here as soon as I could – look, I even ran to the restaurant and they gave me this.” He held out the small box he’d been holding towards you, and you realised it was the gift you left behind at the restaurant; you hadn’t realised until just then, seeing it in the birthday boy’s hands. “It’s from the arcade, right? It’s lovely. I love it. Thank you.”

Seeing the gift just made you cry even harder; the prize wrapped in poor-quality wrapping paper just reminded you of all the great times in the past that you could no longer have; the beautiful moments that you could no longer experience; the wonderful dream that had been crumbled in the wake of your reality. You grazed your thumb over your index finger, over the spot where a plastic green ring used to permanently be, until you’d lost it that one summer. That first gift from Sungjin was your whole world. 

And the prize he was holding onto right then was the whole of Park Sungjin’s old world, wrapped in a single gift – the world he’d left behind so long ago; the world that you were still living in. 

At one point, you believed that you’d created your sole world within the confines of your town, and Park Sungjin was a minor character – never truly around, but still very much there, holding on to remain a relevant part of the story. 

You’d been wrong; the reality was much different – it had always been the other way around. 

“You – you can’t – “ 

It got to the point where you could no longer make any sense – so much for standing your fucking ground. You were a sobbing mess again, just how you’d been before he’d walked in; you took another step back, shaking your head as you kept your eyes down, refusing to meet his gaze. 

“You – you can’t just fucking think that this is just about tonight. It’s not, Sungjin. This is about – about everything that has fucking happened; this is about your mi – missing calls, missing visits, missing the special occasions – missing m – me. I’m st – still stuck here, Sungjin. I’m still fucking stuck in this small ass town, spending most of my time doing nothing but missing you, and I can’t even fucking blame you for it because – because –“

“Baby, please don’t cry. I can’t stand seeing you cry.” 

“Well, take a good fucking look, Sungjin. Because this is how I’ve been for the past fucking year!” you screamed, the sheer volume of your voice surprising even yourself; Sungjin whimpered, his expression saddening as he stayed in place next to the cabinet; he couldn’t move even if he wanted to, not when he knew you would just step further away, and the shattered bottle was barely inches from your feet.

Your head was fucking pounding as the mixture of tears and alcohol slowly took over; but you weren’t done just yet. Everything needed to be let out, right there and then. 

“I can’t blame you, because I know it’s your job. Shit, I know it’s your damn fucking job that I made you accept in the first place. But I didn’t expect it to be like this – I didn’t expect to feel this way.” You paused, trying to find the rest of your words as you found it more difficult to breathe. “It’s so fucking tiring, Sungjin – I am so fucking tired, all the damn time. And I feel so alone; I have never been more alone in my entire life. And I can’t do shit about it.”

“Why – why haven’t you told me?” Sungjin whispered; he was full-on crying now, almost as bad as you were; the birthday gift was placed on top of the cabinet, discarded in the heat of the moment. Seeing Sungjin in a vulnerable state made you feel guilty, but you knew you were doing what you had to; you were both in new territory now, having spent years walking on cloud nine. You had laid it out in the open now, and there was no way to turn back. 

Even if all you wanted to do right then was run to him and pull him close. 

You took another step farther back.

“Because it’s not your fault.” The tears had dried now, but the pain in your heart still remained. “I couldn’t say anything because it’s not your fault; you were just chasing the spotlight, and I had driven you to do so. I want you to do so. But having to be on the side-lines is really, really difficult. I can’t do anything but watch you find your glory; I can’t do anything but watch you leave me behind.

“I kept it in because I felt selfish. God, I am so selfish. Here you were, simply trying to achieve your dreams, and I couldn’t even be happy for you. I wanted you around all the damn time – I need you around all the time – and to not have that broke me. It made me feel invisible; as if I’m an irrelevant ghost that is clinging onto her boyfriend and preventing him from fully fulfilling his dreams. As if I’m just trying so hard to still be a part of your life, even when it’s clear I’m not needed anymore.”

Fuck. The tears were coming back. Sungjin noticed your eyes starting to well up again, and he tried to bend forward to meet your gaze, but you simply turned your head the other way. It wasn’t so much not wanting him to see you; it was not wanting to see him, not without falling to pieces.

“I tried so hard to be patient, Sungjin. But when you didn’t show up for your birthday tonight, something snapped. And I – I don’t know if I can do this anymore.”

“Sunshine, no – “

“Maybe – maybe Jae was wrong,” you breathed, closing your eyes as you tried to prevent yourself from crumbling to the floor. You grazed your thumb over your index finger again, no longer being able to ignore the words you buried deeper than most. They left your lips before you could even comprehend what they meant. 

You took another step back, stepping on broken glass.

You could yourself wince as the pain shot through you, though you weren’t sure what the source was at this point. “Maybe I – I’m just weighing you down. Maybe I’m just meant to be a part of your past, and nothing more. Maybe I’m just holding you back, Sungjin. Maybe it’s best if we – “

You felt the warmth encapsulate you before you could even think. Without so much as a warning, Sungjin had pulled you close and into his arms, burying his face into your neck as he tightened his arms around you. You could hear his slight whimpers as he cried on your shoulder, wetting the sleeve of your dress. You bit your lip to keep from sobbing yourself, but you couldn’t stop the tears that were already there.

The sound of his tears made your heart shatter to pieces, more than anything else that had happened prior.

“I’m so sorry,” he mumbled through his tears, seemingly failing to hold them back as you had. “I – If you want to leave, I’ll let you. I’ll let you go – I can’t imagine how hard this must have been. Fuck, I’m so sorry.”

“Sungjin – “ 

“No, I can’t have you go. Please, please don’t go. Give me another chance. I can’t lose you. Please give me another chance; I love you so much, sunshine. I don’t deserve you. God, I don’t deserve you.”

You stayed silent after Sungjin’s interruption, realising that he was in an internal conflict with himself; between letting you go, and fighting for something that was no longer, and never would be, the same. 

“One more chance, sunshine. Please, just one more,” he continued, catching a breath as he finally chose a side. Slowly, he lifted his head up and met your eyes; you looked into your starry night sky, seeing the sparkle that still remained behind the redness within them. 

In the end you got what you wanted; to be in Park Sungjin’s arms on his birthday, staring up close and personal into his eyes as you basked in the warmth that melted your coldness away. But this was far from what you’d expected – this was no wish, this was your worst nightmare.

“You’re my dream come true, sunshine. I don’t deserve you, and I have no right to stop you from leaving if you want to; but I want you to know that I’ll do better. I can’t promise to always be around; I can’t promise that I’ll stop missing your calls and all the special occasions.

“But I’ll try – I’ll try to never make you feel as if you’re watching me from the side-lines again. You’re my world; the spotlight would be unbearable without you.”

Sungjin grazed his thumbs over your cheeks, wiping away the tears that stained your features. He looked at you with so much warmth, so much love; the same way he had in high school, all those years ago, up until now.

“I love you so much, sunshine. More than anything – please don’t leave.”

Sungjin tightened his arms around you, causing your face to be buried in his chest; you could feel his heartbeat as he held you close, wanting to envelope you in his warmth as much as he could; you didn’t know what to say, you didn’t know what to choose. But in that moment, you truly didn’t care; you were in his arms, on his birthday, basking in his warmth that you depended on to melt the coldness away. Perhaps your futures were uncertain, perhaps this was your worst nightmare; but right there and then, the only thing you could truly focus on was him.

“It’s been so cold, Sungjin,” you whispered, “it’s been so fucking cold.”

On the night of Park Sungjin’s birthday, he had gone through the biggest low point in his life – he had broken both his girlfriend’s heart and his own, and he was the reason you were both on the verge of breaking apart. As he sat there, with you in his arms, he feared the worst – he feared that you would no longer believe in Park Jaehyung’s words, and that you would allow your relationship to fall into the curse. 

But he pushed it all to the back of his mind. It wasn’t important right then – all that was important was you. Instead, Sungjin held you in a tighter embrace, allowing you to cry your heart out into his chest as he protected you from the cold.


	10. Chapter 10

“That was a really tense night, huh?”

“Nah, it was fine. Nothing too bad. Just simply one of the worst nights of my life; give or take.”

Sungjin chuckles at your words, averting his gaze from you and towards the apartment building that had come to be known as an unneeded ghost. You follow suit, looking up to see if you could spot your old balcony, but you’ve genuinely forgotten which one it was; you’ve spent so long keeping the apartment buried in the back of your mind, it was hard to even picture the overall interior – what more the memories of that night. 

It was on this exact night four years ago, only mere hours apart, that you had experienced rock bottom, freezing from the coldness that had cultivated within you – until Sungjin came to take it all away. Having been drunk beyond imagine, you’d woken up the next morning with a dull ache and a fast-paced movie playing in your head, barely able to recount all the words that had come undone. It was as if every scene was paid per view; every little memory that came back to you vague and questionable, as if part of a dream rather than reality. 

If it hadn’t been for Sungjin, who had you wrapped in his embrace at the time your eyes fluttered open, recalling the entirety of the night in detail to help you remember everything you’d laid out in the open, perhaps you would never have even remembered questioning the strength of your relationship. But you had – and despite being granted the ability to keep it a secret, Sungjin decided to tell you the truth, knowing full well of the risks he was taking. 

“You know me, sunshine – I could never lie to you. Whatever you may choose, I hope it’ll be for the sake of yourself – not for me, and not for us.”

The morning of his birthday, Park Sungjin had given you a choice – to either break apart, or keep holding on until time was no longer an enemy. You hesitated, and you bargained; You sprung an internal battle between your head and your heart regarding the biggest internal conflict that you’d ever had to face, but it didn’t take long for you to decide what you truly wanted.

As Park Sungjin sat on your bed in silence, anxious beyond imagine as he waited for an answer, you’d lifted your gaze to meet his, seeing the dark circles from the lack of sleep, and the redness that had yet to properly fade –

And the starry night sky encapsulated within, the one that shone brighter whenever they stared at you, and nothing else; their whole world, the sole centre of your universe; his eyes were your very own spotlight, the kind that you would forever bask in its glory; they were the ones that gave you your answer.

You’d chosen to stay. But even then, the pain of the past would come back to haunt you; it was the main reason you moved out in the first place.

“It wasn’t just that night,” you whisper, closing your eyes as that hell of a year flashed through your mind. The other dark moments; now those you remember. “It was everything else that had led up to it; the nights that made me feel alone and vulnerable. The nights that brought me down as I did nothing but miss you; the nights that kept me believing all of this – all of us – wouldn’t last. But after that night, I don’t know – I could barely stand another second of being here. I mean, you saw how bloody long it took me to even step foot into the restaurant after that night. Having to physically live in the place that was the sole witness to my misery just – it was just too much for me to handle.”

You feel Sungjin’s hand tighten around yours as you spoke, an indication that he’s concerned that the mood has been ruined; you look up and gave the birthday boy a smile, squeezing his hand back as a form of reassurance. 

“I’m fine, Sungjin. Don’t worry; all that is long into the past now. Though, for the life of me, I can’t understand why you decided to bring me here.”

“Just another stop on our walk down memory lane,” Sungjin replies nonchalantly, and you squint your eyes at the annoying ass before squeezing his hand tight, causing him to yelp from the pain.

“Ow! Ow – okay, okay. I brought you here because – because we haven’t talked about this part of our past for a while, which isn’t surprising, of course – this shit happened four years ago – but a part of me always wondered if – if –“

“Dude, use your words.”

“If you regret it,” Sungjin finishes, sighing in defeat as the words leave him. You widen your eyes in bafflement, not understanding what exactly your boyfriend’s implying. He runs a hand through his non-existent hair, closing his eyes to avoid meeting yours. “I – I wonder if you regret giving me another chance.”

Your mouth flies open at Sungjin’s sudden confession, utterly bewildered by the words that left his lips. “Sungjin, why in the world would you think that?”

“Because even after that night, it still wasn’t easy. Work got in the way of so many things – I even had to miss your graduation, for god’s sake – and you can’t lie and tell me that you haven’t felt cold even once in the last four years. Sure, you’ll be moving into the city with me in a few months, but we’ve spent years in a long-distance relationship, neither here nor there, and I don’t mind it, because I love being with you. But I’m not the one on the shorter end of the stick. I just – I realise that things still have never been easy for you, and it drives me insane knowing that you could be – “

Without letting him finish his thoughts, you pulled Sungjin downwards and kissed him, slow and passionate; instead of the typical heart-racing and toes-curling kisses that used to overwhelm you when you’d first started dating, kissing Sungjin now made you calm, a layer of warmth enveloping you as it always does, sinking you in its embrace as you both smile into the kiss, heartbeats slowing down in the tranquillity of the moment as you both realise you’re right where you should be – that you’re home. 

As you hesitantly pull away, you lay your forehead against Sungjin’s; he grins broadly at you, that familiar glint back in his eyes; you watch as his feet skip in place, appearing almost as excited as he’d been when you first told him you loved him.

Truly the real sunshine of your relationship.

You smiled with warmth, placing your hands on his shoulders, knowing full well that your method of melting his troubles away had worked perfectly. 

“The only one allowed to drive you insane is me,” you say, peering into his eyes that remain in very close proximity. “Not your worries, and not your doubts. If you ever have any of them again, then just tell me – I have a way of convincing you otherwise.”

Sungjin nods, snickering to himself. “I might just tell you more often – that was a very fun method of reassurance.”

The birthday boy takes a step back, keeping his fingers intertwined with yours as he glances down towards the watch on his other hand, checking the time. 

You keep your attention on your interlocked hands, smiling as your gaze landed on his wrist. 

“Oh shit, we really have to go – “

“I can’t believe you’re still wearing that.”

Sungjin’s eyebrows scrunch up in confusion, not understanding what you mean until you tap a finger against his wrist, pointing at the subject of your words; a blue wish bracelet, with a small circular pendant at its centre. 

“It was a gift from the person I love most,” he defends, eyes sparkling under the lights as he stares at you. “It’s my whole world; my most prized possession.”

“It did cost me over a dozen tokens,” you muse, your fingers playing with the string of the jewellery; when Park Sungjin first revealed the anonymous prize you’d won for him at the arcade, you’d been somewhat disappointed, having hoped for a better present – but the boy loved it, putting it on instantly without a moment’s hesitation, before planting kisses across your face and telling you how much he loved you. 

At the time, you thought that maybe you could surprise him with even more gifts with the years to come – but the wish bracelet remains to be the only present he’s willing to accept, from you and everyone else; his love for it seems to be contradicting to his cynical character, but you can’t complain – he loves a gift you got for him. That thought alone is worth any surprise you could cultivate over the years.

“I can’t believe it still hasn’t broken off, though. I mean, this is cheap jewellery from an entertainment avenue. I’m surprised it didn’t wear off on the first day.”

“Hey, it’s just waiting for the right time.”

“It’s been four years.”

“It is waiting for its owner to allow it to break off.”

“It’s physically impossible for it to last this long. Are you sure you didn’t buy a new one behind my back?”

“How dare you.” Sungjin huffs, and you laugh at his offended expression. “I’ve worked hard to maintain this bracelet; it needs to fall off at the right exact moment.”

“And what moment is that?”

The glint in Sungjin’s eyes appear brighter now, if that was even humanely possible. “We’ll find out soon enough. Oh, and while we’re on the topic – we really need to go now if we’re going to make it to the park before midnight.”

“What – the park?! Sungjin, that’s all the way back to the arcade.. We literally passed by it on the way here. Why couldn’t we have just stopped there before coming here?”

“Because that is not how the itinerary works. Come on, we need to go – “

“Why can’t we just head back to the restaurant? I’m hungry, and I’m tired.”

“Come on, sunshine – don’t you want to find out what all of this has been leading up to? You said you wanted answers.”

You huff, crossing your arms around your chest, biting your lip to keep the hidden smile from emerging. “Fine, I’ll go – but I’m not walking.”

“Then how exactly do you wish to get there?”

“You’re giving me a piggyback ride.”

Sungjin gasps in an exaggerated manner, making you roll your eyes at his idiocy. “All the way to the park? Baby, you can’t be serious.”

“Take it or leave it, mate. I swear, whatever you’re planning better be freaking worth it because I’ve had to spend almost two hours walking in this cold ass weather in the middle of the – “

“I love you.”

Sungjin’s sudden words of affection catch you off-guard, your eyes widening as you look at him weirdly; you were just complaining your ass off to try and annoy him, this wasn’t the outcome you were expecting.

“Why – “

“Four years ago, on this night, I stood here, scared out of my goddamn mind. I’d fucked up – I knew I’d fucked up bad – and I knew I would be dealing with a lot by the time I saw you. So, for minutes on end, I just stood outside this damn building, too much of a coward to deal with the reality that I could possibly lose everything in one night; that I could possibly lose you.”

“Sungjin, I told you – “

“But I didn’t. I didn’t lose a thing because you decided to stay, and not a day goes by that I don’t thank the stars for letting me continue to be with the woman of my dreams. That I don’t thank you – thank you, sunshine. Thank you so much for giving me another chance. Thank you so much for continuing to put up with me despite how hard it gets. Thank you for – “

Sungjin closes his eyes, his voice suddenly trembling towards the end of his words – a part of you believes he might even end up crying. 

“Sungjin, what’s going on? Are you okay?”

“I’m incredible.” He sighs, opening his eyes and beaming down on you, reaching his free hand up to pinch your cheek. “I’ll save the rest for later. But now we need to go.”

“Later? What do you mean – “

Sungjin turns his back towards you, hunching down as he stretches his arms back. You eye him suspiciously, and the boy slightly turns his head back, raising an eyebrow at you. “You said you wanted a piggyback ride, didn’t you? Now hop on.”

A grin creeps onto your face as you watch the love of your life adjust himself on the ground, waiting for you to get on his back. With a laugh, you climb onto his back and wrap your legs around his waist; Sungjin places his arms on the back of your thighs to hold you in place, making sure you’re perfectly balanced on his back before slowly standing up and turning in the direction of the park. 

The park. The place where you first told Sungjin you loved him. 

Sungjin walks at a pace slow enough as to not drop you, but quick enough that he’ll be able to get to the park before midnight. You still have no clue what the hell the boy is up to, but you’ve given up on trying to guess – there’s simply no point in wrecking your brain for a surprise you’ll soon find out anyway. Instead, you bury your face in Sungjin’s neck as he continues on the journey, jokingly grumbling every now and then about how much you have him wrapped around your finger. 

When silence descended upon you both halfway through the journey, you lift your head from the birthday boy’s neck and place your chin on his head, smiling to yourself as a thought crosses your mind.

“Hey, Sungjin?”

“Yes, sunshine.”

“It turns out Jae was right, wasn’t he? That our futures are permanently aligned.”

Sungjin chuckles, shaking his head as he thinks back to his friend. “The dude’s annoying, honestly. To be fair, sunshine, we’ve got the rest of our lives to find out whether or not the idiot’s right.”

“Well then, I hope he’ll never be wrong,” you mumble, feeling your eyes start to grow heavy; the walk has taken a lot more out of you than you deemed, and as you speak, the words come to a slow. You place your head on Sungjin’s shoulder and drift off within a second, not hearing his response as sleep overtakes you.

Sungjin looks up at the stars and bites his lip, praying to the stars that everything will turn out the way he wants to. The night is coming to a close; he hopes that once the clock strikes midnight, he’ll be able to declare tonight as the best birthday of his lifetime. 

“I hope so too, sunshine, I really hope so too.”

Sungjin glances down, eyeing his wish bracelet that is brushing against the fabric of your dress, just waiting to be broken off; if all goes well tonight, Park Sungjin realises that he will finally have the right moment to do just so.


	11. Chapter 11

On the day of your sixth-month anniversary, you and Sungjin had decided to spend it at the arcade. 

It was a simple celebration for what seemed like a momentous event – when in high school, surpassing the sixth-month milestone deserved more than barely any time in the spotlight – but you knew Sungjin would hardly appreciate going all out for a mere half-year anniversary, so you decided to go with his plan of having a minimalistic date of the things you usually do. 

It wasn’t that big of a bother to you anyway. When looking back on the day, you weren’t expecting to remember the celebration you held – you were planning to reminisce on something of a much bigger significance; at the end of the night, you were going to give Park Sungjin the surprise of a lifetime – you were going to tell him you loved him.

You couldn’t pinpoint the exact moment of realisation, but you knew it was a long time coming. You had both spent the past year utterly inseparable, gradually befriending one another before slowly cultivating a relationship; in that period of time, you’d gotten to know the frontman for who he is, the person he wants to be, and the person he can be. And you fell utterly in love with all of them. At first, you had simply denied it, declaring internally it was a mixture of pure admiration and infatuation; you were just sophomores, you shouldn’t even know what love is. Not in the way that people claim it to be. 

But you couldn’t deny the effects Sungjin had on you; you couldn’t ignore the comfort that overwhelmed you whenever he enveloped you in his warmth; you couldn’t pretend not to smile into his kisses as your heart raced and your toes curled in delight; you couldn’t feign not noticing the sparkle in his eyes reserved only for you, the one that would appear only when you silently caught him staring, not daring to expose him for fear that he’d divert his gaze and avoid from doing so ever again. 

At first, all those factors had been merely a want; you wanted to feel Sungjin’s arms around you constantly; you wanted to broadly smile at the feeling of his lips against yours; you wanted to have him stare at you as if you were a spotlight, the only one worthy of capturing the attention of a starry night sky. 

But soon enough, those wants turned into a need. You needed him more than you wanted him. You needed his touch, you needed his words, you needed his gaze. You needed him in the sense that you could never imagine life without him, because being without Park Sungjin would be living out in the cold, frozen and unable to breathe. 

Eventually, you conceded to the fact that you were simply more than just smitten; you had fallen – and you had fallen hard. There was no reason to try and justify it; if others wanted to believe that the youth couldn’t fall in love, then they could continue to do just so. There was no need for others’ approval to begin with – you knew you were in love with Park Sungjin. That was the only form of approval you needed. 

Of course, it shouldn’t come as a surprise – when being with Park Sungjin, falling was always simply a matter of time. 

Though, that didn’t mean you were any less of a nervous wreck. 

You’d been fidgeting the entire time you were at the arcade, your heart racing in your chest at over a mile a minute; you were excited and fearful at once, wondering since the morning just how your boyfriend would react – would he tell you he loved you too, or would he have the same opinion as the majority and tell you it was all moving too quickly? Sungjin’s always been much more of a grown-up than the other boys at your school – definitely more mature than his bandmates – and that made it much harder for you to assume exactly what’s on his mind. He was unpredictable, especially when it came to your relationship; any sort of confession you gave had to come with the risk of the boy not willing to reciprocate. 

But that’s okay. It was okay if he didn’t say it back. Some people just take a longer time to realise they love someone, as they usually remain in a state of denial before inevitably conceding. Some people are waiting for their significant other to say it first, because they are also scared that their love would be one sided, even if all signs say otherwise. 

Of course, there was always the third option; the one where some people simply don’t feel the same way, and it takes their significant other professing their love for them to acknowledge that the relationship was never that serious on their part, and they would have no choice but to break it off before things took an inevitable turn for the worst. 

Perhaps it wasn’t so okay if he didn’t say it back. 

“Hey, are you alright? You look pale.” Sungjin’s words made you break from your worries to come back to the situation at hand; you were at the skee-ball machine, playing your second round as you waited for Sungjin to take his turn; having been so preoccupied with your own thoughts, you’d missed every shot you made, causing Sungjin to win over you by a landslide. It had been the same way with air hockey and even the damn clawing machine; you were both usually equally competitive, never going easy on each other, but your attention was far from the present and much closer to the future – closer to the end of the night. 

“I’m fine,” you replied, smiling warmly at the boy in front of you; Sungjin’s face was a mixture of evident worry and concern, clearly wondering what the hell had gotten into you today. He furrowed his eyebrows in an endearing manner, eyes glistening under the neon lights, lips turning down into a worried pout; it should be illegal for someone to be so damn adorable. “Should we go? The arcade’s about to close anyway.”

“You’re just saying that because I’m crushing you at this.” 

“I wouldn’t say “crush,” – “

“Destroyed. Obliterated. Take your pick, sunshine.”

You grinned at the term of endearment, feeling your heart flutter in your chest; Sungjin had only started calling you by the nickname around a month ago, but it was already your favourite word that left his lips. “Fine, you beat me. Let’s go now; we can take a walk through the park or something.”

You tried to sound nonchalant as best you could; it was hard to keep things secret from Sungjin, especially hidden agendas; the park was where you’d decided you would profess your love to him, after much planning and contemplation. The park was perfect; it wasn’t too far for you to walk from the arcade, it would be silent at night with the exception of fallen leaves being crushed by the sound of your footsteps; it would be out in the open, directly underneath the starry night sky that gradually became a distinct reminder of Sungjin’s eyes. You would walk side-by-side into the night, fingers intertwined between you before you stopped halfway, turned to him and finally let everything off your chest. If it all goes well, he would tell you he loved you back; if it all turns another path, well, you didn’t want to think of the consequences you might have to bear. 

Instead, you prayed to the heavens that everything you had planned would be written in the stars.

“The park? At this hour?” Sungjin raised an eyebrow at you, already questioning if ulterior motives lay beneath your words. You groaned internally; of course this boy would have to make it all the more difficult. 

“Yes – I mean, the weather outside is really nice.”

“I don’t know, it feels a little too cold, to be honest.”

“Sungjin! Can we just – I mean – just a ten-minute walk. Come on.”

“You’re being really persistent,” he mused, and at this point it was clear he was simply trying to mess with you – how bloody annoying. Maybe he wasn’t all that different from his bandmates, after all.

You rolled your eyes, huffing in frustration. “If you don’t want to go, then fine. Let’s just go home.”

Sungjin laughed at your clear aggravation, taking a step closer to reach his hand up and pinch your cheek. “I’m sorry. I’m just teasing; I’ll come with you, but on one condition.”

You peered your eyes at him, attempting to divert his attention from the amused smirk on your lips. “And what is that?”

“It’s awfully cold tonight. Can I keep you warm?”

Sungjin lifted up one side of his coat and motioned towards the small, vacant space, wanting you to cuddle up next to him in its warmth. You felt your cheeks blush profusely at his gesture; you turned your back towards him as you buried your face in your hands, trying to hide the sudden embarrassment you felt. 

Arms snaked around your waist as an extra weight is placed on your shoulders; you turned your head slightly to find a starry night sky sparkling beside you, staring into you as if you were the only thing worth shining for. 

For a moment, standing in place underneath the iridescent lights, his arms around you as he gazed into your eyes in a way that made your heart melt, you almost let the words fall off your tongue; an opportunity was presenting itself with the largest sense of temptation, and would he truly not tell you he loved you back? When he looked at you like this?

You opened your mouth slightly, wanting to get the words out and have it be over with – but then you hesitated, and turned your head away from him again. 

You had a plan. You were going to stick to it, no matter how much the urge to tell him was killing you inside. 

“Sunshine? Are you alright?”

You sighed as Sungjin buried his face in your neck, humming against your skin. “You just catch me by surprise sometimes, Sungjin.”

“Is that a bad thing?”

Sungjin released one hand from your waist, lifting it up to pinch your cheek. You groaned, though a grin still found its place on your lips. “Far from it, though it can get incredibly annoying.”

Sungjin laughed, the sound resonating through the room as he moved a step back to intertwine his free hand with yours. “Shall we go? The arcade’s closing down anyway.”

You breathed deeply, ignoring the hammer in your chest; you tightened your grip on Sungjin’s hand, seeking solace in your second home. 

“Let’s go.”

\- - - 

You’d barely even made it to the park without shivering immensely from the cold breeze. 

Winter had barely even begun, yet the temperature in your town had dropped a considerable amount within the past week, causing weather forecasts to predict snow falling sometime within the next few days. You were wearing more than enough layers to survive the chill, but it seemed your body still refused to cooperate with any weather with a clear absence of heat; noticing just how much you were trembling, Sungjin took his arm out of the left sleeve of his coat, creating just enough space to pull you into the comfort of warmth with him.

You were pressed flush against Sungjin as he placed part of his coat over you, wrapping an arm over your shoulder; you sunk into his embrace, basking in the warmth that you would grow dependent on with the years to come. Your footsteps remained in unison as you arrived at the park; you hadn’t been here in a while, never getting the chance to simply leisure around as other commitments remained a constant priority. It was as beautiful as you hoped it to be – the wind blowing through the trees, grass covered in icy frostbite, fallen leaves creating a bed of autumn colours that made up your path; it was a simple yet breath-taking view, a perfect balance of what came as second nature to you both. 

You smiled as you took in the sight, glad to have this be the place of what you hoped would be your favourite memory; next to you, Sungjin copied your grin, loving how happy you seemed despite the simplicity of your date. While the fact may remain somewhat discreet in the eyes of others, Sungjin knew how much you loved being in the spotlight, lavishing in a little extravagance – he would do all that to please you if he could, but he was barely into junior year; he couldn’t financially afford to spend so much money on his love life just yet- the poor boy couldn’t even afford to buy you a gift. When he had no choice but to ask you if you’d be willing to celebrate your anniversary at the arcade, Sungjin had felt guilty. Even when you told him that the arcade was more than enough, a part of Sungjin still believed you were secretly disappointed that you couldn’t have a slightly more momentous celebration. His doubts only multiplied when you acted strange throughout the entire date. 

But seeing you then, with the warmest grin on your face, the kind that personified the sun in its entirety – Sungjin’s doubts slowly melted away. 

He couldn’t resist but to pinch your cheek again, causing you to grumble for the nth time that night. 

“What are we doing here exactly?” Sungjin asked, eyes wandering around the vacant space. You shrugged, trying to keep the act of nonchalance as your leg fidgeted in place. 

“Just for a walk. Until we can find a place to sit down and talk – “

Your eyes roamed the premises, trying to find the perfect location to execute your plan – your gaze landed on the sole bench in the middle of the park, illuminated by the moonlight of the night sky, just a few metres away from where you were standing. 

Just perfect. 

“There! We can sit there and – and talk. We have so many things to talk about. Right. We need to talk.”

The words left your mouth at a speed Sungjin couldn’t comprehend, and his eyes widened as you suddenly turned into a babbling mess. “Uh – is this a good sort of talk?”

“Yes! Oh, don’t worry, it’s nothing bad – I’m not breaking up with you. Far from it, in fact. I mean, it would be really awful for me to break up with you on anniversary, and if I were planning on doing it, I wouldn’t do it today, you know?”

Silence. 

“I – I don’t want to break up,” you added, watching as Sungjin tried to prevent the amused smirk from presenting itself on his face. 

Fuck. He figured it out.

“To the park bench, then?”

“Totally.” You sighed, grateful that Sungjin didn’t try and interrogate you. It was already bad enough that you could hardly lie to him, but having to turn into a nervous wreck with no given reason certainly didn’t help to strengthen the facade you were trying so hard to maintain. After that moment of monstrosity, you decided it had now become a matter of professing before your incompetent acting abilities turned into your downfall. You needed to bolt to the bench and say the words in order to catch him off-guard and give him the surprise of a lifetime. 

You shrugged Sungjin’s coat off your shoulder and released your arm from his waist, taking a step forward as you were aiming to frantically skip towards the bench; forget wanting to tell him halfway through the walk, you would end up ruining the moment more than you already had. It was now or never. 

But before you could move further, Sungjin pulled you back towards him by the waist, pressing your side flushed against his once again. He draped the coat back over your shoulder and bent down slightly to whisper in your ear.

“Remember the condition: I get to keep you warm.”

You rolled your eyes at your boyfriend’s bloody annoying antics, ignoring the chill that ran up your spine as you were suddenly made aware of the close proximity; you tugged at the sleeve of his shirt, motioning for him to move. “Come on, we need to get to the bench.”

“Why are you in such a hurry? I like staying like this with you.” 

“Because there’s something I have to say, and I can’t say it unless we’re sat on that very bench.”

“O-okay.”

Before Sungjin could get another word in, you slipped your arm back on his waist and pushed him forward, practically forcing him to move. Sungjin laughed at your eagerness, before pulling you closer to have you next to him on the path. 

The walk to the bench was so excruciating slow that you were certain the words would spill out of you before you would even make it there. It didn’t help that Sungjin kept trying to ease you into conversation, teasing you about your strange behaviour. You’d first planned to tell him halfway, then you planned to bolt and tell him at the bench; right there and then, you were caught in a conflict between both.

Which future moment would create a lovelier memory for you to look back on? If you were planning on surprising Sungjin, what scenario would leave a better lasting impression? You hadn’t even begun to take into account the various reactions he could give –

“Hey, sunshine?”

Sungjin stopped in his tracks in the middle of the path, and your mind raced as you went back and forth with the choice in your mind, eyes still focused on the destination ahead. 

“What is it, Sungjin?”

“Look up. It’s snowing.”

You paid little attention to your boyfriend’s words, and simply turned your head to find him staring up at the sky; you scrunched your eyebrows together as you averted your gaze upwards, only to open your mouth in awe as you realised he was right. It was snowing; albeit barely evident, the sight of snow falling from the sky made you grin excitedly; you might not be able to stand the cold, but snow was an exception you loved, especially considering that it was just the extravagance you needed to create the epitome of a beautiful moment. 

This was it. This was the time. 

You diverted your attention back to the boy next to you with the warmest grin on your face, only to realise that he was already looking at you, that familiar glint reserved only for you in his eyes. You inhaled deeply as you stared into them, realising this was the moment of truth. You had to get it out of your chest; it was now or never. 

“Sungjin, I – “

“Fall in love with me.”

Sungjin’s words interrupted your momentum, and your mouth remained open in shock as you comprehended his words. You shook your head, believing you must have heard him wrong. 

Did Park Sungjin just ask you to fall in love with him?

“Sungjin – I – I don’t – what?”

“Fall in love with me. Please fall in love with me. I know I can’t give you much; I’m not incredibly rich, I don’t like being in the spotlight, I’d take simplicity over anything extravagant that could be handed to me on a silver platter; I’m not the kind of guy you should be with. Everyone at school believes so too. The student body president dating a mere frontman? I have nothing else to my name besides the band, and even then I try my best to avoid any form of recognition I get. I know it must be hard to put up with me and my constant need to be incredibly simple and private; I know it must be hard to not have the glorious relationship underneath the spotlight that you want and I can’t give. 

“I might be way over my head, and this might be moving a little too fast – but fuck it. I don’t care. Sunshine, please fall in love with me. Because – because I’m in love with you.”

Silence took the place of Sungjin’s words. As snow poured around you both, you remained unresponsive to Sungjin’s profession, barely able to comprehend all his words at once. Sungjin just told you he loved you – Sungjin just asked for you to love him back. If there was ever a moment to experience the shock of a lifetime, this would be it; to say you were taken aback was an understatement the stars above you would agree with. 

Right there, underneath the snowing night sky, Park Sungjin had just given you the surprise of a lifetime. And it was the perfect memory to remember in the years to come. 

“Sunshine, can you say – “

This time, it was your turn to cut the precious boy off. Without letting him say another word, you pulled Sungjin down by the collar of his shirt and crashed your lips into his, feeling his warmth encapsulate you as you melted into his embrace. You felt the frontman smile into the kiss, figuring out your answer without having to hear your words. As you both pulled away, Sungjin leaned his forehead against yours, poking your nose with his own.

“You look gorgeous tonight, you know that?”

The sparkle in his eyes appeared brighter than before. You poked his nose back, letting the warm grin overtake your features.

This moment – this moment itself was better than any extravagance the spotlight could give.

“Park Sungjin, I love you too.”


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is it. This is the one with the answers; this is the one you will cherish most.

“Sunshine, wake up; we’re here.”

The soft sound of Park Sungjin’s voice in your ear causes you to flutter your eyes open; you lift your head from Sungjin’s shoulder, still in a daze as you try and comprehend your surroundings. The cold breeze blows through your hair as the familiar sight of frostbitten grass and snow-covered trees greet you, welcoming you to the memorable place you’d abandoned for some time. 

Just like the arcade, the park isn’t too far from your home, very much within the premises of your small town – but you’ve become too committed to other priorities to pay the park a visit. There’s simply been no time to walk around leisurely as you used to back in high school, especially now with your moving to the city in a few months. Real life has sadly gotten in the way of reliving the precious moments of your past. Besides, there was no real reason for you to come visit without Sungjin around.

Of course, that doesn’t mean this place didn’t hold a very special place in your heart – it is the setting of the first milestone in your relationship; the day you both professed your love for each other, knowing that there was no turning back. That day was almost eight years ago, and yet the memory still remains vivid in your mind.

It is the one you cherish most. 

Upon seeing that you had successfully awoken, Sungjin slowly hunches down onto the ground, allowing you to unwrap your legs from his waist and climb off his back; you feel somewhat guilty for having made him carry you for a good amount of distance in the cold night, not even having the decency to keep him company as you fell asleep on his shoulder without much resistance. To make up for his efforts, you slowly reach up and kiss the precious boy on the cheek, causing him to raise an eyebrow at you. 

“What was that for?”

“You carried me all the way here; I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be. I wanted to do it. Besides, you’ve always been a diva.”

You roll your eyes at Sungjin’s teasing, poking your tongue out as he grins at you. The birthday boy steps forward and intertwines your fingers back together, lifting his free hand up to pinch you on the cheek.

You groan, playfully slapping his hand away. “Why do you like doing that so much?”

“Because you’re really cute. And getting to tease you is just a bonus.” 

“What a nice boyfriend you are.” 

“The best,” he replies, poking your nose with his finger. Before you can retort, Sungjin pulls you closer and wraps an arm around your waist, enveloping you in a hug. He embraces you tighter as he buries his face in your neck, planting kisses along your shoulder. You’re surprised by the sudden gesture, but more so by the sound of his heart beating; you swear you feel his heart beating over a mile a minute, as if he’s in a state of anxiety and nerves; but there’s simply nothing to be nervous about. 

“Baby, are you alright? Your heart’s beating really fast.”

“I’m the best because you make me the best,” Sungjin mumbles, ignoring your question. Your face is plastered with concern, not completely sure if his heart is racing from simply being with you in the moment, or due to the plan that he’s kept hidden the entire night. Whatever it may be, you decide not to press further – there’s only a short time left until midnight, and Sungjin promised that you’ll get your answers then. 

Sungjin releases you from his embrace, taking a step back but still keeping his hand on your waist. “Are you cold? I can keep you warm if you want.”

You smile, nodding your head in acceptance. It was surprisingly less cold than expected, with it being late into the night in the middle of winter, and you find yourself being able to maintain your composure without shivering profusely; after having spent a long while in the cold over four years ago, you’ve grown quite accustomed to it, not hating the low temperature as much as you had back in high school. Of course, there was simply no chance that you’d ever turn down an opportunity to bask in Sungjin’s warmth. 

Sungjin releases your interlocked fingers, removing his arm from the sleeve of his jacket. He pulls you flush against him and drapes the jacket over your shoulder, just as he had eight years prior. The memory of that night flashes in your eyes as the similar sense of warmth encapsulates you; you’ve created a parallel event that is similar to your past in almost every sense, expect now you’ve grown more attached to Sungjin than your past self could even begin to dream. If you had the ability to stop time, you would hit pause on this moment right here – this moment of realisation that you have been with Sungjin for years, yet over time, your love for him has only ever grown deeper.

Although it’s been over eight years, any moment with Sungjin still remains better than any extravagance the spotlight could give. 

You take Sungjin’s hand in yours again, leaning your head against his shoulder as you take in the sight of the snowy park. “What are we doing here, Sungjin?”

“We’re taking a walk down memory lane. Don’t you remember the memories made here?”

“Vividly. But I’m serious, what are we doing here?”

“We’re here to get you your answers.” Sungjin looks down and winks at you; you smirk at the sight, ignoring the way your heart skips a beat. “Not much longer till midnight, sunshine. I promise you – everything will make sense then.”

“If you say so,” you concede, sighing at your boyfriend’s antics. Truly, Park Sungjin has been acting strange all night; he’s been scheming some kind of plot behind your back, he’s been using his birthday as an excuse to get you to follow said scheme, he’s been dropping romantic confessions and giving warm embraces without warning; if you didn’t know any better, you’d think he was about to give you another surprise of a lifetime, but there was genuinely no surprise that could shock you as much as the one already created in this very park. 

Perhaps you didn’t know any better. 

“Let’s head to the bench,” Sungjin speaks, motioning towards the sole park bench that still remains intact after all these years, being illuminated by the moonlight, with the additional help of a million stars dancing in the sky. “It’s such a perfect place to talk, isn’t it?”

“I guess. I mean, I wouldn’t know – we never exactly made it that far.”

“Shut up.” Sungjin pouts in an utterly adorable manner, and you laugh at the endearing act.

“I still remember it clearly: “fall in love with me, because I’m in love with you.” God, you were really cheesy, you know that? Almost as much as you are now.”

“At least I managed to take you by surprise; your plan failed badly because of how much in a frantic you were.

“My plan failed because of you. I could’ve executed it perfectly if you could’ve resisted the urge to tell me.”

“Blame your acting abilities, sunshine. Not me.”

You poked your tongue out at your boyfriend again, causing him to snicker in your ear. He wraps his arm tighter around you and takes a step forward, pushing you slightly as an indication for you to do the same. 

“Come on, we need to walk faster. You’re only getting answers if we make it to the bench within the next few minutes,” Sungjin muses before proceeding to walk down the path with you right next to him.

“Why not just bolt for the bench, then?” you ask, and Sungjin averts his gaze towards you, shaking his head in an exaggerated manner.

“How am I supposed to keep you warm if we’re running? Come on, we’ve got time.”

Sungjin leads you down the path towards the bench, the sound of ice crushing beneath your footsteps. You stare up towards the sky and pout as you notice the absence of an incredibly significant detail from your memory. 

“There’s no snow.”

“I know.” Sungjin sighs, copying your action of averting his gaze upwards. “I was really hoping it would snow tonight.”

“Aw, why? So we could re-enact your monologue again?” 

“Don’t act like you didn’t love it with your whole heart, sunshine. It resulted in an unforgettable memory, didn’t it?”

He’s right. You did love it – you still do. Although you have fun teasing him senselessly about it, a part of you will always remain grateful to Sungjin for taking the first leap, and melting away all the doubts you had about telling him you loved him. His profession brought you to this very moment, in his embrace, reminiscing on your favourite memory of your entire relationship by replicating it down to almost every last detail. 

Your anger towards him and the boys for having fooled you mere hours earlier has since vanished ; his reasons for bringing you around town are still beyond you, but whatever his plan may be, it has given you the chance to visit all the places you’ve kept buried in the back of your mind, be it intentionally or otherwise. And for that, you’re willing to forgive them. You’re moving to the city soon; with both your hectic schedules, who knows if you and Sungjin would have been able to loom back on all these memorable venues that defined your relationship, if tonight never occurred?

Tonight is Sungjin’s birthday, but it seems that he is the one giving you the gift. 

“Thank you,” you speak once you both arrive at the bench. Sungjin shrugs his jacket off of you as he loosens his embrace, allowing you to sit down on the bench; it’s covered in icy snow, but you’re simply too lost in the moment to care. You pull Sungjin down next to you and turn to him, bringing your interlocked hands to your lips in order to plant a kiss on his knuckles. 

Sungjin stares at you with widened eyes, as he buries his other hand in his pocket, clearly surprised by your sudden burst of gratitude. “For what, sunshine?”

“For tonight – for all this. It’s been so long since I’ve even stepped foot in the park, or the arcade and that damn apartment. The memories I’ve created – that we’ve created, they’ve all been pinpointed to these three significant locations; all our milestones, the turning points in our relationship were created in the places you’ve brought me. The fact that I’m getting to say goodbye to them with you just – it means so much. It’s your birthday, yet this entire night has felt like a gift for me.”

“Sunshine – “

“This – this is a guess, but is that the reason why you’ve made me roam with you around this entire town to reminisce? So that we could say goodbye, together? If that’s your surprise then, Sungjin – thank you. It genuinely does mean so much to me that you even thought about doing this when it slipped my own mind. I owe you tremendously for this; I love you so much, Sungjin.”

You inhale deeply, closing your eyes as you take a breath once your words have been let out into the open. Silence descends upon you both; you wait for Sungjin to speak up, to tell you whether or not you’ve figured out his plan, but he says nothing. Slowly, you open your eyes – and the starry night sky is staring at you once again, this time in much close proximity; your knees brush together as Sungjin’s eyes look into yours, a certain glint in them that you’ve seen a million times before, yet somehow this one appears different. It appears brighter. 

Sungjin’s lips crack into a smile as he averts his gaze momentarily to the pocket of his jeans, before meeting yours once again. 

“So, am I right?” you breathe, trying not to get lost in the beautiful eyes that still look at you as if you’re the centre of the spotlight, even after all this time. Even after everything you’ve been through.

“You are,” Sungjin answers, chuckling as he leans his forehead against yours. “Well, to an extent. You see, sunshine, your guess about my reasons are correct – I did this to reminisce on all our milestones with you, to bring you back to the times that remain most memorable in our lives; our first date, our biggest fight, the first time we said we loved each other. I wanted us to remember those moments, to remember all the good and bad times we’ve been through, to remember that no matter how much we’ve gone through and how many times we falter, we’ve always remained by each other’s side. I needed to ensure that you would remember those moments by midnight, because – “

Sungjin pauses; he glances back down, this time at the watch on his wrist.

He looks back at the centre of his spotlight. “It’s officially midnight.”

You grin with content, leaning forward to give the birthday boy a peck on the lips. “Happy birthday, baby. I love you so much.”

“I love you too,” he responds, and within such a close distance, you notice tears start to form in his eyes. 

“Sungjin, what’s wrong?”

“I love you so much.” He ignores your question again, leaning back as he takes out his hand from his pocket – along with a small box, wrapped in poor-quality wrapping paper. 

You glance down at the object and laugh, wondering how the hell the boy even had the time to win this. “Seriously, Sungjin? A gift from the clawing machine – I mean, it’s incredibly sweet. But aren’t we a little to old for this now?”

Sungjin smiles at you, yet says nothing. He places the anonymous prize in the palm of your hand. “Open it.”

“Why? Are we hoping it’s another piece of jewellery?” you tease, hoping to see the birthday boy laugh – but he simply motions towards the box, urging you to open the gift. 

With a bewildered look on your face, you carefully unwrap the box, not sure why Sungjin is suddenly unresponsive.

“You shouldn’t have gone through all the trouble for this, Sungjin. I mean, I didn’t even get you a gift and I’ll probably end up losing this like – “  
You pause as you successfully unwrap the prize, seeing an unfamiliar sight you’re sure does not belong in any clawing machine; it’s a black leather box, one that looks incredibly extravagant, far too luxurious to be a simple prize from an arcade. One that appears brand new, as if it cost more than a fair sum of money – one you didn’t expect to see for a million years.

It can’t possibly be. 

“I love you, sunshine,” Sungjin whispers. “Open it.”

Your heart thunders in your chest, not exactly sure if your assumptions are correct, far too fearful that you might just be wrong. If what you think this is turns out to be true, then – then this moment, this moment right here, is truly the biggest surprise of a lifetime Park Sungjin could possibly give you. 

With shaky hands, you place the small box between your fingers, carefully opening the lid as the beating of your heart resonates through your ears. It is then that you see it – your dream come true. The climax this whole night has been leading up to. The surprise of lifetime you’d never even begun to expect. 

You see your whole world, wrapped in a small gift.

An emerald ring.

“Sungjin – “

The tears flow from your eyes before you even notice; slowly, you turn your head to meet Sungjin’s gaze; he beams at you, the starry night sky glistened over with his tears, and says the few words that end up confirming your suspicions, and making you cry even harder.

“Should I get down on one knee?”


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hold on, the story isn't over just yet ♡

There is just so big of a surprise one person can handle. 

As you stare down at the ring before you, sparkling with such brightness as the striking green becomes illuminated by the moonlight, the realisation of the night gradually comes to you in the form of waves; the sudden planning of a surprise party, the last-minute missing balloons, the familiar voice of Park Jaehyung in the background of your phone call – all these loose ends slowly tie together in your head, connecting the dots to all your prior questions, offering you the answers you sought from having been fooled at the beginning of the night. Everything leading up to this very moment had simply been a giant red herring, a diversion to distract you from the momentous ending; there were many hypothetical events – a considerable amount of scenarios that played in your head throughout the course of the night, though none were as surprising to you as this moment right here. 

Underneath the starry night sky, at the very place that holds the memory you cherish most, Park Sungjin proposes to you with a ring that is unequivocally a similar colour to the first gift he’d ever gotten you. He’d taken you on a trip down memory lane, he’d offered you the chance to say goodbye to your favourite places together, and now he’s given you the biggest shock of the night. It has been surprises layered on top of surprises in the span of a few hours, and the feelings have all come to overwhelm you at once, causing you to express them in no other form but tears. 

You don’t cry much – you never cry. Sungjin never cries either. You are simply not an emotional couple; you aren’t as openly vulnerable as most couples tend to be, simply because it’s never been in either of your nature to express your feelings in the most cathartic way. 

But as you stare at the ring in front of you, and Park Sungjin stares at the centre of his spotlight, there is nothing you two can do but let the tears flow. 

“Wow, I didn’t expect I’d be this big of a mess,” Sungjin speaks, chuckling to himself to try and lighten the moment; it comes to little avail, as the tears he tries so hard to hold back still end up meandering down his cheeks. You wipes them away vigorously, blinking hard to prevent more from making an appearance, and you smile through your own tears, barely comprehending the situation at hand – your mind is still more than overwhelmed, but the sight of Sungjin will always make your heart melt. 

“Okay, I – I should begin.” Sungjin rubs his eyes again, hoping for the tears to pause momentarily so he can get his words out; he lifts your interlocked hands and places a kiss on your knuckles, before averting his gaze back to yours. 

Damn those bloody eyes. Even with a hint of redness, they still manage to look at you as if you’re the only one worth shining for. 

“Well – surprise, sunshine.” Sungjin beams, and you huff in annoyance; this boy, truly. It seems that planning to propose has brought out the playfulness within him. He laughs at your reaction, reaching out his free hand towards you to pinch your cheek. This time around, you resist the urge to groan. 

“Sunshine,” Sungjin whispers, the name leaving his lips in such a delicate manner, and you realise the time for fun and games has come and gone; this is now everything Sungjin has been wanting to say, for heaven knows how long. “There is not a day that goes by where I am not eternally grateful to Jae for giving me the push to introduce myself to you, during the showcase in our sophomore year. I’d noticed you for a while, even before you were declared student body president; but I was too shy to even say hello – I mean, you were this fierce, strong-willed girl who had the spotlight shining down on you, and even if no one else seemed to notice, I could tell you loved it. I knew you loved it; my past self believed that he couldn’t possibly compare. If Jae hadn’t told me to get over myself and practically forced me to attend the meeting, perhaps we wouldn’t even be here.”

You chuckle as the memory plays in your mind; the day that bloody ass Park Jaehyung had nonchalantly remarked that your futures would soon align. 

It’s annoying, truly; how that boy always seems to be right. 

Sungjin smiles wider, looking somewhat relieved to see your tears have momentarily halted. You’re not surprised – the boy has always found it hard to see you cry. 

“On our first date at the arcade, when you willingly gave the place a chance despite not having been there before, I knew that you cared for more than just the very extravagance in life. You cared about simply being there in the moment, with me – to see your smile, that damn smile that provides with warmth I never even knew I craved, that’s when I realised that this would never be like all the past relationships I had. And when you put that ring on your finger, I knew I was in it for the long haul.”

Sungjin paused for a breath; you tightened your grip on his hand, never letting go. Never wanting to. 

“I told you that arcade was my second home,” he continued, “but that – that’s no longer true. You’re my home, sunshine. You’re the one I wish to come back to. You’re the one I want to see, every single day, every single moment, whether I’m here or anywhere else in the world. Those few years where I had to spend months away from you was torture in the worst way imaginable – I missed you, I craved you, I needed you there. To not be able to constantly have you in my arms, to not be able to keep you warm whenever the cold came; I knew those were the sacrifices I needed to make for the sake of the band, for the sake of achieving a place in the spotlight, but fuck if it didn’t hurt like damn hell to be away from you. 

“The day after we almost broke apart, the day after I almost lost you was when I realised that I never wanted to live without you. That I never wanted to risk losing you ever again. That you were the one person I needed by my side, be it by the side-lines or otherwise.” Sungjin lifted his hand to show you his treasured wish bracelet, running his fingers along the string. “The day I wore this was the day I made a promise to myself; a promise I vowed to keep – that I would ask you to marry me, when the time was right, and that it would be in the most perfect way imaginable. It needed to be – because it’s you. I would fit the whole world and wrap it in a gift if you asked me to. That is just how much I love you.”

“Sungjin, you’re going to make me cry again.”

Sungjin chuckles, grinning broadly to prevent you from noticing the tear meandering down his cheek. “I hope that’s okay.”

He runs a thumb over your fingers, stopping at the spot where a beautiful emerald ring would fit elegantly, with utmost perfection. “When I found out that you would move into the city, that’s when I knew that the right time had come. We’d spent the whole of our relationship creating memories within the confines of this small town, reaching milestone after milestone; now that we’re both leaving; we’re both saying goodbye to this beautiful place that will forever pinpoint all of our beautiful memories, I figured it would be more than perfect to create one last milestone – in the place that holds our favourite memory yet. 

“I’m not saying I want to get married right away, sunshine; I know moving into the city will take time to adjust, especially with your starting a new job and my constant touring; perhaps people might say we’re moving into this a little too fast, but fuck it, I don’t care. I’ve never been more in love with you than I am right now, and I’ve never been more assured of anything in my life than I am now. You’re my whole world, sunshine. You complete me more than anyone else -you’re the only one I want to spend my time in the spotlight with.”

Sungjin stands up slowly, loosening his grip on your hand to hold your fingers within his palm; he takes a step forward and turns to directly face you, slowly crouching down onto the snowy pavement.

“Sungjin, you’re going to get wet.”

“I don’t think that really matters right now, sunshine.” Sungjin grins, and you feel the tears start to well up within you again. He takes the small, leather box on your lap and places it within the palm of his hand; he’s down on one knee now, your hand in his, remaining in each other’s solace; the ring is directly facing you, the emerald gem sparkling in the moonlight, almost as bright as the eyes of the person you love most; the starry night sky stares into you, with so much warmth, and so much love – just as it always has since all those years ago. The glint within them reserved only for you is distinct, much brighter than it ever has been, and there is simply nothing else around you but him. And only him. 

“Sunshine, the first time we came to the park together, I asked you for a favour.” Sungjin’s words ring loud and clear in your ears, and your heart starts to beat over a mile a minute. “Back then, I asked you to fall in love with me. Now, I’m asking for a bigger one; I’m asking you to allow me to spend the rest of my days with you, to live our lives by each other’s side despite any hardship we may face, to continue being each other’s homes no matter where we may be, to chase after a spotlight worth much more than on a mere global scale; I’m asking you for forever, sunshine. And I pray to the stars that you’ll give it to me, because I am more than ready to give it to you.”

The tears come again before you can even react; Sungjin bites his lip to evade his own tears, though it results in little avail. 

“We’re really fucking cheesy, aren’t we?”

You laugh as Sungjin huffs in frustration, wiping his tears with the sleeve of his jacket, before regaining his composure; as you find yours, you look back down at the love of your life, and he breathes in one last time. 

“Sunshine, I love you so much – will you marry me?”

Time comes to a stop around you. In that moment, with Sungjin bent down on one knee, the only thing you can think of is just how much you love the birthday boy; he is your stars, your dream come true, your best surprise of a lifetime, the best kind of extravagance the spotlight can give. 

This moment – this moment right now is the one you’ll cherish most. No other moments may compare.

There is only one detail missing; the single extravagance needed to create the epitome of a beautiful moment. The perfect ending. 

The words leave your lips in a single instant, with no hesitation – there is too much love in a single moment for you to be convinced otherwise. 

“Park Sungjin, of course I’ll marry you.”

Time continues, and everything moves at a quicker pace; Sungjin stands up and takes the ring out of its box, slipping it onto your finger, right where an old green, plastic ring used to permanently be; you close your eyes as the warmth of it envelops you, realising you’ll never have to fear the cold again. 

You now carry a part of Park Sungjin with you; a promise you believe implicitly he will never break.

“Try not to lose this one, yeah?” Sungjin teases, and you scrunch up your face in annoyance, lifting your hand up to pinch the birthday boy’s cheek. 

“Hey!”

“You deserve it. Now, are you going to kiss me or do I have to listen to another sappy monologue?”

Sungjin laughs at your words, the sound resonating through the public space; he loops his arm around your waist and pulls you close, leaning his forehead against yours before poking his nose with your own. 

“I love you, sunshine. Forever.”

Without letting you say another word, Sungjin places his lips on yours, and you sink into the warmth of his embrace as he pulls you closer. You feel your heart coming to a slower pace, losing yourself in the tranquillity of the moment as you realise you’re right where you should be.

On the night of Park Sungjin’s birthday, he has given you the surprise of a lifetime, yet it is you who has given him the best gift he could possibly receive. 

The promise of forever.

As Park Sungjin kisses you underneath the starry night sky, you think back to the past eight years you’ve had together; you think back to high school, with the everlasting spotlight and the shining neon lights; you think back to the opportunity of a lifetime, with your pushing a hesitant Sungjin to pursue his dreams and Park Jaehyung’s promise that nothing could keep you two apart; you think back to that intoxicated night, a mixture of pain and words come undone and shattered glass; you think back to the very place you’re in, with the first surprise Sungjin has given you, the profession of love that was the creation of an unforgettable moment; you think to this moment, right here in Sungjin’s arms, realising that you’re in this for now and forever, and that you wouldn’t have it any other way. 

Thank heavens for that Park Jaehyung for always being right. Your futures truly do remain permanently aligned


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're almost to the end. Thanks for staying this long ♡

Park Sungjin claims he has one more surprise left in store. 

You’re seated back on the bench after sinking in Sungjin’s embrace, staring lovingly at the beautiful engagement ring that fits perfectly on your finger; you grin to yourself as you graze your thumb over the white gold holding the emerald in its place, catching a partial of your reflection in the striking green gem. Sungjin has given you more than a fair share of gifts in the past, but this one evidently takes the cake. Your heart still races at the mere sight of it; a dream that seems to good to have come true. 

“It’s so beautiful,” you breathe, glancing up to look at the love of your life who stands before you, grinning his ears off as he silently watches you admire your surprise. It’s a silent relief to discover just how in love you are with the gift, especially considering the long hours he’d taken to find the perfect ring – the one worthy enough to encapsulate the whole world, to ask you for forever.

There were so many varieties in a single store that it made his head spin to even think back to that time all those months prior; he’d spent more than a fair share of hours analysing and contemplating every ring he could find; there were rings with bodies ranging from gold to silver; there were others with unique stones ranging from diamonds to pearls; there was even a range in the number of carats bestowed upon each stone, apparently according to their specific size, though Sungjin could barely begin to comprehend exactly how the measurements worked. He was a man of simplicity, never being one to indulge in a little extravagance, but he’d endured through hours of luxury jewellery to find the right one to propose to his sunshine with. 

When he’d finally stumbled upon a white gold ring embedded with the most beautiful emerald gemstone he’d ever laid eyes on – a similar shade to that of a small, plastic ring his girlfriend had treasured eight years prior – Sungjin realised he’d found what he’d been looking for. There was no doubt of its beauty and luxury; the kind of jewel that shines in the moonlight to allow others to bask in its glory. The epitome of a beautiful extravagance; it was more than perfect for you. 

“I’m glad you like it.” Sungjin bends down to give you a kiss on the head, before placing his forehead against your hair. “I knew it was yours from the moment I set eyes on it.”

“It is mine,” you agree, though your gaze has since averted to the birthday boy hunched over you. “Thank you, Sungjin. For everything.” 

Sungjin buries his face into your hair further, placing another kiss on the top of your head before proceeding to take a step back, linking his fingers with the hand that carries your now greatest treasure. “I could say the same towards you, sunshine. A million times over. Although, that might just result in both of us crying our eyes out yet again, so I’ll refrain myself.”

You laugh, the sound brighter than the sun, a personification of the name Sungjin adores calling you. He smiles at your warm sight, never taking his eyes off the very centre of his spotlight; when you lean forward in an attempt to regain composure, Sungjin places his hand underneath your chin, lifting your face up towards his. He leans forward as well, still hunched over you in such a close distance, before poking his nose with yours. 

“The sky’s beautiful tonight,” he declares, leaning his forehead against his precious sunshine. “Almost as gorgeous as you are. While I’d love for nothing more than to stay in this moment forever, sunshine – I think it’s time we head back to the restaurant.”

“The restaurant?” you question as Sungjin takes another step back, this time to allow you to stand on your feet; as you get up from your seat, you peer your eyes at the birthday boy who seems to have another trick up his sleeve, a sheepish grin suddenly plastered across his features. “So that whole party set-up isn’t just a distraction? We’re really throwing you a party?”

“I wouldn’t say a party,” Sungjin muses, pulling you closer as to loop his arm around your waist. “But in case you’re forgetting, it’s still my birthday. And tonight, I fully intend on celebrating.”

You raise an eyebrow, a playful smirk appearing on your face. “Guess we’ll really have no choice but to celebrate January 16th now. If you think I’m not planning to celebrate the hell out of my engagement anniversary within the upcoming years, you’re dead wrong, Sungjin.”

Sungjin pouts at your words, trying to repress the underlying smile he can’t help but conjure. “It seems that my plan has sadly backfired on me.”

“Oh, definitely. You should’ve just picked another date.”

Sungjin chuckles, clearly amused by your words. “Well, any other day wouldn’t have been as big of a surprise.”

“I’ll admit to that. Although, it truly wouldn’t have mattered, Sungjin. I’d be just as happy as I am now regardless.”  
Sungjin’s embrace tightens around you as he lifts a hand to pinch your cheek. You groan in protest, as you always do, and he smiles before placing his lips against your ear. 

“I wanted it to be perfect,” he whispers, and you close your eyes as his warmth envelops you. “Because I needed to give you the whole world.”

Sungjin buries his face in your hair again, his words causing your heart to remain in a permanent molten state. Damn your fiancé for being so good with his words. 

“You never have to worry about that,” you respond, leaning your head against the birthday boy’s shoulder. Your heartbeat comes to a slow as you find yourself in your home. “I’ve got my whole world right here.”

Sungjin smiles into your hair, loving how you’ve echoed the very words he said to you a mere few hours ago in front of your old apartment. Sighing, he releases you from his grasp yet keeps your hands intertwined, just as he has been doing throughout this entire night. 

Just as he wishes to do until his next lifetime. 

“Let’s go,” Sungjin says. “It’ll be another long walk from here. You sure you don’t want another piggyback ride?”

“Incredibly tempting,” you admit, clicking your tongue as your realise the long distance you would have to endure in order to make it back to the restaurant. Of course, with the amount of ecstasy you’re currently high on, every step you take already feels like walking on cloud nine. 

“I’ll pass. You’ve already drained your bank account for this ring, I can’t be so heartless as to want to drain your energy as well.”

“I agree completely. In fact, given the circumstances, you should be the one giving me a piggyback ride.”

You snap your head towards the boy next to you, eyes widening in bewilderment. “Excuse me?”

“I believe it’s only fair. I am tired too, you know; not to mention the weight of my credit card bill after purchasing the ring is especially weighing down on me.”

You roll your eyes at your fiancé’s idiocy. “You can’t possibly be serious, Sungjin.”

“Oh, I am. Come on, sunshine, get down on the ground.”

“Dude, even without the oh-so-heavy additional weight, you’d break my fucking back.”

Sungjin laughs at your annoyed expression, before slowly releasing his hand from yours. You furrow your eyebrows in confusion as a smirk appears on his face. “Guess we’ll just have to make a slight adjustments, then.”

“What the hell do you mean slight – “

Within an instant, Sungjin’s arms are around you again; this time, he wraps them around your waist before pulling you flushed against his back, slightly bending forward which ends up causing you to have to bend in the same direction as well. 

“Park Sungjin, what are you doing?” you ask, somewhat infuriated by the fact that you have to remain in a bent position, though Sungjin simply laughs again. 

“An adjusted piggyback ride. See, my legs are still on the ground, so you don’t have to worry about me breaking your fucking back; but I still get to enjoy having you this close to me throughout our entire walk back to the restaurant. It’s a win-win situation, really.”

“You’re still going to end up breaking my back if I have to walk in this hunched position all the way there.”

Out of the corner of your eye, you see Sungjin poking his tongue out at you, not expecting you to notice. With an annoyed groan, you slightly turn your back to face him, ready to stare him down for being so bloody annoying –

When you feel the first flake of snow fall from the sky. 

Park Sungjin loosens his grip on your waist as he averts his gaze upwards, clearly noticing that snow had begun to fall as well; you look up to see the slight drizzle pouring down on you in the cold weather, making your heart race in your chest as the very sense of dejávu overwhelms you. This is an exact replica of the now second most beautiful memory you’d created in this very park, all those years prior. It was the sole detail needed, to create the epitome of a perfect memory. 

As the winter breeze begins to pick up from the gradual drop in temperature, you move your head back down to stare at the boy next to you, his gaze still focused on the sudden change in weather; the sparkle in his eyes appear distinct as the actual starry night sky is reflected in his eyes. Your heart comes back to a normal pace as you watch the grin widen on Sungjin’s lips; he slightly skips in place, just as he always does when he’s filled with elation, clearly overjoyed that his wish for tonight to snow had actually come true. 

This boy. This bloody annoying boy whose eyes you see stars in and whose warmth you can’t help but grow dependent on. This is the boy you’ve been with for the past eight years; this is the boy you’ve promised to be with until the next lifetime. This is the boy you’ll marry one day. 

In the moment, all you can think is how goddamn lucky you are. 

Sungjin turns back to you with the wide grin still on his face. The starry night sky is no longer reflected, yet his eyes still appear as bright as ever. 

“It’s snowing,” he states, and you laugh at the true endearment in his excited tone. 

“Yes it is. A perfect detail to add to a perfect memory.”

“Told you I shouldn’t have picked another date.”

You shake your head, rolling your eyes for the nth time that night. Considering how much he’s enjoying teasing you, you wouldn’t expect that this boy had just asked you to marry him barely half an hour ago. 

“Come on, we’re going to be late,” you say, taking his hands back into yours before turning your back towards him.

“Sunshine, what are you – “

Sungjin pauses as you wrap his arms back around you, pulling him forward until he is flushed against you again.

“You wanted an adjusted piggyback ride, didn’t you? Well, I’m giving it to you,” you say with pure nonchalance, though a small smile is permanently fixed on your lips. “Can you hurry up and bend down so I can drag you there? I’m hungry enough as it is.”

Within the corner of your eye, you see Park Sungjin’s smile widen, if it were humanely possible, and he more than happily obliges to slightly bend forward, pressing a kiss on the nape of your neck. 

“Let’s get going then.”

Without another word, you drag Sungjin out of the park and in the direction of the restaurant, his weight slightly dragging you down and forcing you to walk slower than normal. The slightly adjusted piggyback ride is proving to be somewhat unproductive, and you’ve begun to realise just how much of a nuisance it truly is. 

But as you slightly turn your head back every now and then throughout the journey, you see the grin that never falters from Park Sungjin’s face. And you realise that every single nuisance is worth enduring when it comes to him.


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One final chaoter before epilogue. Please wish me luck for my finals; they'll be helping me get into college ♡

Sungjin gives you the answers to the little loose ends that remain in place by the time you’re just a few blocks away from the restaurant. 

Your back is still pressed flush against Sungjin, his arms still tightly attached to your waist, though you’re now standing upwards rather than being hunched forward; halfway through the journey, Sungjin had lifted you slightly off the ground for a split second, rendering you in sudden shock before he placed you back down in an upright position, kissing the nape of your neck as a form of assurance that nothing’s wrong. 

“You just looked tired,” he whispered into your ear as he softly pushed you forward to continue the journey. “We can’t have that when we’ve got more celebrating to do.”  
You’d huffed in annoyance, though you were more than grateful to no longer be worried about the future pain of having your back arched for a moment too long; you continued on your path and snow continued to fall around you, encouraging Sungjin to stretch his jacket out as he did his best to keep the extra layer of clothing wrapped around you as well. 

“Is it too cold, sunshine? Don’t worry, I’ll keep you warm.” 

Sungjin’s words have been repeated a number of times over the past, though they still made your ears redden in delight. You’d managed the rest of the journey in the warmth of his embrace, finding the coldness underwhelming even with the temperature having dropped so low. 

Now, you remain barely a few metres away from your usual spot for chicken and beer, with Sungjin telling you the details of the surprise he’d executed with his beloved members. 

“I bought the ring before I figured out how I wanted to propose,” he speaks; fingers curling around your own – specifically the one showing off a luxurious emerald stone. “I had no plan in motion, I barely even knew the words I wanted to say, or the events that should transpire leading up to the moment. All I was sure of was that it would happen at the park, just on time for my birthday, to create a beautiful surprise.”

Sungjin kisses the top of your head to encourage the blush forming on your cheeks. “It was the boys who helped me plan out the entire evening. Dowoon had been the first one to find out – damn boy somehow went through my drawers and found the ring – and it didn’t take long for the other members to receive the news.”

“Were they happy to find out?”

“Incredibly. Sickeningly happy, honestly. At one point I questioned whether I was proposing to the girl of my dreams or four idiots I’ve been stuck with since high school.”

You laugh, head falling back to come in contact with Sungjin’s chest. You open your eyes to see him smiling down on you, starry night sky shining in all its glory. You lift your head back up and secure his arms in their place before taking another step forward, allowing Sungjin to continue his story.

“Kang Bra was the one who initiated the plan, telling me that if I was going to give you the surprise of a lifetime, I needed an extra twist to catch you off-guard. That’s when the birthday party came into plan; I don’t remember even agreeing to letting Jae and Brian take charge, but that’s how it ended up happening.”

“They seemed to have fun doing so.”

“They love us, sunshine. Of course they did.”

You smile to yourself as the thought of the two idiots you’ve always loved flash into your mind; their never-ending teasing and reckless antics staying similar all throughout high school and beyond; two adults who simply never found the need to grow up. Two boys who’ve come up with an elaborate ploy, one that included infuriating you enough to throw you off their scent and fooling you with their ridiculous yet believable carelessness. They managed to execute a red herring perfectly, without your even wondering if another plan was in motion until the very end. They’re bloody annoying idiots, those boys. 

You can’t possibly thank them enough for everything. 

“They really do,” you agree, chuckling at the sudden flashback. “It’s why I genuinely believed they were throwing you a surprise party. No other alternatives even crossed my mind. I guess I have to applaud them for pulling it off.”

“We were definitely pulling it off – until Jae’s dumbass had to go yell in the background when he knew I was on the phone with you.”

You laugh again, shaking your head as the call from your car manages to fit into the night’s timeline. The call that exposed a large part of the plan before it had been properly executed. Of course, with Park Jaehyung and Kang Brian, there’s bound to be one type of slip-up or the other. In hindsight, amidst of every detail you’re just discovering, the sole fact that Jae alone managed to almost screw up a well-thought out plan doesn’t surprise you in the slightest. 

“What the hell was even happening, though? I mean, why were they at your house?”

“The plan was for them to leave the restaurant after decorating and come back to my house to pick up the rest of the boxes. We couldn’t leave the rest at their apartment because you would be there to pick up the balloons, and their arrival time might collide with yours. We were expecting you to call me on the way to the venue, and I would leave as soon as you did to find you surprised to not see anyone around. Of course, that revelation ended up being a second too quick.”

“It’s alright, Sungjin. It wasn’t a major mistake.”

“I know; I can only blame myself for not realising the boys are incapable of keeping their mouths shut.”  
You giggle softly, bringing Sungjin’s hand upwards to plant a kiss on his knuckles. You spot the restaurant just up ahead, its lights dim in contrast to the bright street lights along the pavement. You furrow your eyebrows in confusion, wondering why the usually bustling restaurant with customers constantly walking in and out seems to appear less lively. For a moment, you consider the idea that they could have closed up early for the night. 

Until a small detail that still remains a loose end finds its way into your mind. 

“Sungjin,” you breathe as you finally arrive in front of the restaurant. Standing in front of it now, you see that it truly is entirely vacant; not only so, it was pure dark inside, barely any source of light to allow for a view into the venue for any passerby to peek look in. The only tiny specks of light you can spot as you peer into the restaurant seem to come from... candles. 

Sungjin releases his arms from your waist; he moves to your side and opts to link your fingers again for the nth time that night, letting you find solace in his being by your side – being home. You turn your head to the birthday boy who is already beaming down on you, explicitly unworried that his favourite celebration spot seems to have closed for the day. If you didn’t know any better, you would actually believe that the restaurant was properly closed and vacant of any staff or customers. 

But after the events of tonight, you do know better. 

“Sungjin, why exactly did Jae and Brian get more boxes for?” 

The question hangs in the air as a smirk appears on his lips, yet he keeps his silence; instead, he pulls you behind him and towards the glass doors and places his hand on the handle; in the split second pause, you manage to get a better view of the inside, taking a peek from behind Sungjin’s shoulder to see the interior.  
This time, even with dimly lit candles, you see everything waiting for you inside explicitly. And your heart melts in your chest. 

“Baby – “ 

Sungjin opens the double doors and pulls you inside.  
After all those years prior of being obliged to spend your boyfriend’s special day surrounded by the torrid heat transmitting inside an overcrowded room and the overwhelming scent of fried food and alcohol, you’ve come to grow familiar to the place that Sungjin and the boys hold dear, even if you initially held an underlying sense of unsatisfactory after several failed attempts of persuading him to indulge in a little extravagance. Just like the arcade, you’ve accepted the restaurant as part of him. It is the simplistic alternative to extravagance that Park Sungjin prefers, as he is not one for birthdays, and that is who he is. 

For the first time, on the night of Park Sungjin’s birthday, he gives you the celebration you’ve been wanting for the past eight years, in the most romantic way you can possibly fathom. 

First comes the sound of music. You hear the soft tune from the moment you step foot into the venue; you can’t pinpoint the source, but the sensual sound of the guitar distinctly rings into your ears and tugs at the strings of your own heart, causing it to race as your eyes take in the entire room. 

The room is dimly lit, appearing almost as dark as it did from the outside looking in, but the source of light that shed from the candles in candelabras provide you with more than enough to spot the rose petals on the ground, leading up to the sole lit room in the vicinity – the same room you had been escorted to a mere few hours ago, when you were still in the dark to what the rest of the night had in store. 

Park Sungjin, how many more surprises can you possible give?

Sungjin tightens his grip on your hand, making you turn to him with your mouth open in shock and gratitude. 

“Sungjin, did – did you rent out the entire restaurant?”

At your question, the birthday boy smiles. For once, he decides to answer instead of feigning ignorance. “It’s only for two hours. I asked the owner here for a favour – in case you’ve forgotten, we’re sort of regulars here.” 

“I – I don’t even know what to say. Sungjin, this is too  
much.”

“It’s one night, sunshine. One night, after eight years of us keeping things minimal and far away from the spotlight as we can. Eight years of your persuading me to celebrate the special occasions in some way other than chicken and beer, yet my stubborn self refused to go anywhere else. Technically, I still am very stubborn, but I thought I’d come to a bit of a compromise this time.”

“Still can’t evade the chicken and beer, can you?”  
“Not in this lifetime, sunshine.” Sungjin grins and pulls you back to him, pecking your cheek in an affectionate manner. “I apologise for how cliché this entire surprise is.”

“I wouldn’t say it’s that cliché – “ 

The music that encapsulates the room takes a momentary pause; you look at Sungjin with a baffling expression, wondering why the room has suddenly descended into silence –

When Sungjin’s voice makes a grand appearance, singing to your favourite song that you’ve cherished since high school. 

Tears start to form in your eyes as Sungjin’s raspy voice covers a delicate tune; you shake your head and bury your face in his shoulder, causing the boy to laugh in delight.

“I take it back. You are incredibly freaking cliché.”

“Please, you love me.”

“I do, but still – “  
“Are the future bride and groom ready to be taken to their seats?”

A voice in the distance makes you yelp in surprise; Sungjin laughs again as you cling onto him, clearly not expecting such a big reaction. With your face still buried in his shoulder, you turn your head to find the waiter you’d met earlier emerging from the kitchen in the dark, eyes wide as he looks at you apologetically. 

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to surprise you.”

“It’s okay,” Sungjin replies, ruffling your hair as pulls you away from him. “She’s just had her fair share of surprises for today.”

“One more might just kill me,” you mumble, peering your eyes at the birthday boy. He sticks out his tongue and motions for the waiter to escort you to the room, and you can’t help but blush at how a little too much this all seems. 

Familiarity is a privilege you’re more than happy to have, but you can’t help the way your heart melts at the grand gesture Sungjin has conjured for tonight.

“I can’t believe you managed to pull this all off,” you whisper, and Sungjin gives you a sheepish smile.

“Well, like I said, I had help – “

“Surprise!”

You yelp again as a joint loud voice is heard from inside the room you’ve been escorted to. With wide eyes, Sungjin seems to have realised a fact that you have yet to comprehend, causing him to pull ahead of the waiter with you in toll. Inside the room, you are impressed once again by the sudden change in interior; the simplistic decorations still remain, though the balloons you’d brought now take up a large portion of the walls, alternating between white and gold. The food has been set on the table for four; you spot the usual chicken and beer surrounding a large white cake that remains at the centre, adjacent to a bouquet of red roses. The ‘SURPRISE!’ banner appears to no longer be hung, though you can still see it perfectly in your vision as your eyes wander the room. 

You’ve been grinning with warmth from the moment you and Sungjin step foot into the small space. But it isn’t due to the decorations, nor is it due to the food; it is due to the two boys at its centre, grinning their ears off as they held onto the large banner, a bottle of champagne and glasses also in hand. 

Jae and Brian skip in place at the sight of the couple entering the room, eyes lighting up as they spot the glistening emerald ring on their best friend’s finger. 

“She said yes!” Jae yells, dropping the banner out of his grasp and onto the floor; Brian follows suit, cheering next to him as the former pops the bottle of  
champagne, causing foam to ooze out as the other idiot next to him holds out the glasses for the alcohol to be poured into. You can barely interpret the situation, everything seemingly happening at once; the only thing you are able to comprehend is how happy you are to see them. 

The same, however, can’t be said for Sungjin, who is glaring at the two with aggravation. 

“You two aren’t supposed to be here,” he says, and his members simply shrug with nonchalance. Brian moves forward to hand you the champagne glasses as Jae continues to speak.

“We couldn’t wait.” The guitarist shrugs with  
nonchalance, before turning his gaze towards yours. “We needed to know right away whether our two best friends were engaged.”

“I mean, there was simply no reason for you to say no,” Brian interrupts; he places a glass in your hand then proceeds to wrap an arm over your shoulder, rubbing his knuckles into your hair. “You should thank me, dude. I came up with the idea.”

“There really is no need for that.” Sungjin rolls his eyes, pulling you out of Brian’s embrace. You keep your silence, though the warm smile on your features continues to grow. “And I specifically told you two to leave after the finishing touches.”

“But – but we want to celebrate too.” Jae pouts, alternating his gaze between the couple in an attempt to gain sympathy. “You owe me this; you wouldn’t have had the guts to even talk to her eight years ago if it weren’t for me.”

“That was so damn long – “

“Our whole futures could have been different – “

“Dude, this is my birthday – “ 

“Thank you,” you speak, once again meeting Park Jaehyung’s eyes. The two boys pause their bickering and turn to you; you bite your lip and shake your head at the sight of three boys whom you loved more than anything. 

“Thank you, Jae. You’ve done a lot to support me and Sungjin over the years and – and even when we almost quit on ourselves, you never did. Even as sophomores, you always believed we would end up together. You never doubted us for a second.”

“People often tell me I’m psychic,” Jae jokes, though you can see the redness forming on his cheeks. 

Sungjin peers his eyes at the older boy, who turns his back on you to hide the sheer embarrassment. You chuckle and turn to Brian, who grins at you sheepishly – his glass of champagne is already half empty. 

“You guys take too long,” he muses. “Even though it was all an act, I’m still very upset I don’t get to see Sungjin drunkenly humiliate himself in front of guests.”

The birthday boy groans. “I would never get that drunk.” 

“You would be so adorable though!”

“Would you just – “ 

“Thank you to you, too,” you say, ignoring the next form of bickering that just commenced; after all these years, you’ve grown more than accustomed to all the pointless banter. “According to Park Sungjin himself, you’re the mastermind behind all this; it was a really, really momentous surprise. I can’t imagine being proposed to in any other way. Thank you.”

Sungjin’s hand finds yours once again as his members blush furiously at your gratitude, not expecting to be hit with several compliments at once, especially by the girl who constantly becomes the object of their teasing. Your gratitude is responded with silence as Brian places his face in his hands and turns around as well, evading your stare. You laugh as the two boys remain publicly embarrassed, and Sungjin bends down to peck your lips. 

“You got them to shut up for once,” he whispers into your smile. “You’re so incredible.”

“I have you to thank most,” you reply, poking your nose with his. “But that can wait until later tonight.”

“How I really wish these idiots weren’t here right now.”

“Let’s keep them around, yeah? We’ve got all of tomorrow to spend alone. We’re engaged, and it’s your birthday – it just wouldn’t be the same without them.”

Sungjin sighs, though he nods in agreement. “You’re right. Fine, we’ll keep them around.”

Sungjin pecks your lips again before lifting his head in the direction of the two boys, who now seem to be finishing the rest of the champagne bottle as they alternately pour and down the alcohol.

“Hey!”

At the sound of Sungjin’s voice, the two slightly jump in place before turning their heads towards the frontman, eyes widening in fear – or perhaps, from intoxication.

“We’re sorry,” Brian apologises, biting his lip as he continues to keep his head down. “We’ll leave if you want us to.”

“We don’t,” you respond; with those words, the two boys lift their heads up again, eyes brightening as they watch Sungjin hesitantly nod in approval. 

“You’re not mad? But we’ve almost finished all the champagne.” Jae holds the bottle out to you, a look of bafflement across his features. You chuckle at the boy’s antics, not sure how you’ve managed to put up with him for this long. On any other day, perhaps you would be even more annoyed than Sungjin by the boys’ idiocy – but tonight, there’s simply nothing that could bring you down from the starry night sky. 

“I like beer more anyway,” you answer. With that, Jae and Brian clap their hands together, before scurrying to the table of four near the corner of the room.

“Wait till Wonpil and Dowoon hear about this,” Brian exclaims, sitting himself down as Jae takes a place next to him. “They already regret not being here; they’ll hate themselves even more when they find out we didn’t get kicked out.”

“Has their flight arrived? Should we call them?” you ask, reaching into your pockets to retrieve your phone; Wonpil and Dowoon have also been with you throughout all these years, and the former remains to be your closest friend out of the rest in the band; it’s dreadful that they can’t both be here to join the celebration. 

“Last time we called them, they’d just gotten into a cab from the airport. They’re heading here now.” Park Jaehyung reaches for a chicken thigh, though Sungjin’s raised eyebrow causes him to retract his hand. “You should give them a call. They really wish they could be here right now.”

“I’ll give them a call,” Sungjin speaks, letting go of your hand to reach for his own phone. He turns his back to head out of the room, but not before giving you another peck on the cheek.

“Sunshine, I’m entrusting you to keep an eye on the boys and make sure they don’t eat all our food. They’ve already drunk our champagne, we can’t let them get to our chicken too.”

You wink at the birthday boy and nod vigorously, before heading towards the table where the two boys ogle over the food in front of them.

“You’re going to have to wait a while, boys,” you speak, and the younger groans in misery.

“The food will get cold. We waited for so long.”

“You could leave.”

“Oh, but you’ve already begged so hard for us to stay.” Jae winks, and you grumble in annoyance. 

“You two make it so hard to be thankful.” You sigh, and the boys grin with delight. You peer your eyes at them, hiding the smirk that makes its way to your lips. “But I meant every word I said. Thank you. Despite how much you both make me want to pull my hair out, I really am thankful for you both.”

The boys start to blush again, suddenly incapable of meeting your eyes once again; it seems that your annoyance is the only form of compliment they can receive. It takes a moment before Brian works up the courage to meet your gaze, speaking in such a serious tone that you wonder if this is truly him.

“We’re thankful to you too, you know? You’ve been Sungjin’s rock all these years; you’ve been our biggest fan since before we even made it out of this town. You gave Sungjin the push he needed to continue leading the band, which in turn gave us the chance to continue our dreams as a five-member band. All of this – the entirety of our careers – could be compromised if it weren’t for you. You keep him going – you keep us going – even from the side-lines, always having our backs even from miles away. Not only that, but the two of you give us so much hope when it comes to love. You remind us that even as musicians, we’re capable of finding the one and falling in love; that the dating curse is breakable. Without you two, perhaps we wouldn’t be as hopeful.

“You – you two are often the subject of my songs,” Brian gushes, and you grin as he bows his head again. Next to him, Jae snickers, though your eyes finding his causes him to clamp his mouth shut. 

“Got anything to say to me, Jaehyung?” You raise an eyebrow, and Jae scratches the back of his head as he searches for the right words to say, before exhaling in an exaggerated manner, as if the thought of having to thank you requires all the strength he can muster. If you weren’t in such a good mood, perhaps a shoe would already be flying across the table.

“I concur.” Jae grins, and the sneer from you only allows his smile to grow broader. “But to add on to everything Brian’s said; you’re more than just our leader’s girlfriend. You’re our best friend too! You’re like the unofficial member of the band, dude. You make Sungjin really happy, and you also put up with a lot of our shit even if you don’t have to. You let us tease you – let might be a stretch considering the amount of footwear that’s been aimed at me – but you humour us from time to time, which is really great.

“We love Park Sungjin, but this whole night has been for both of you.”

“We wanted to give you both your whole world, wrapped in a gift,” Brian ends, and a part of you is stunned for words. Kang Brian has been articulate with his feelings before, but not Park Jaehyung. The bloody annoying boy who has brought you and the love of your life together. The one who masks any sentiment with wits and humour, because he can never bring himself to express his feelings through verbal words. 

Hearing his and Brian’s sentiments out loud take a different route than you expect, as it ends up being your turn to blush. 

“Aww.”

“Shut up; I hate you both.”

“We love you too,” they say in unison, holding up finger hearts, causing you to cringe internally at how atrociously cheesy they’ve suddenly become. 

“Also, you convinced Sungjin to let us stay – which is a huge plus,” Brian muses, averting his gaze back to the food that lay in front of him. “What the hell is taking that dude so long?”

“I’ll go check on him,” you respond, getting up from your seat as Jae’s grin turns to one of smugness.  
“Aww, what a good fiancée you are.”

You pay no attention to the boy’s teasing, simply rolling your eyes and turning to the other man seated. “By the way, you guys set up the place right?”

“Indeed we did, madam.”

“Do you happen to have scissors on you?”

\- - -

You walk out to the sound of Sungjin’s voice singing in the background. Just a few metres away, your fiancé stands near the window as his figure is silhouetted by the light emitting from the single lit room; he continues to talk into the phone, a soft smile playing on lips, explicitly bright even in the dark. You hear his voice that comes in whispers as you step closer, unable to bear the temptation of eavesdropping on the conversation. 

“Don’t worry, we’ll wait till you get here. Yes, Wonpil, you can talk to her once you arrive – I know you’re upset you can’t be here, but not everything turns out as planned. I really wish you two could have helped too.”  
You take another step forward until you’re directly behind your fiancé, your breath against his neck as you place your chin on his shoulder; Sungjin remains unstartled, turning to meet your gaze as his smile broadens, lifting his hand up to pinch your cheek. 

“Can I talk to him?” you mouth, and Sungjin nods before eagerly handing you the phone. Your fiancé has never been one for long phone calls, while your best friend is always more than willing to talk anyone’s ear off; why he volunteered to even call Kim Wonpil in the first place, you’ll never know. 

“Hey, Wonpil – it’s me.”

You hear a voice on the other end squeal with delight, and it is then you realise how much you’ve missed your former vice. “Oh, my gosh – finally. I’ve been telling him to put you on the phone, because I wanted to congratulate you; you two are engaged! I can’t believe it, it seems like such a dream come true. Dowoon wants to congratulate you too, but he’s driving so I can’t put him on the phone. By the way, don’t you dare leave the restaurant until we’re there. Promise me.”

“I promise, Wonpil.”

“Good. Because I’ve had to endure an atrocious amount of days stuck in Japan from cancelled flights; you wouldn’t believe what the weather there is like right now. Dowoon and I had to – “

“Hey, Wonpil?”

“Yeah?”

“I’ll hang up now, okay? There’s something I need to talk to Sungjin about. We’re waiting for you here, so tell Dowoon to drive safe. Don’t be sorry for not helping out, you two; you’ve done enough just by being happy for us. I love you both so much.”

“We love you!” You hear a deeper voice yell in the background of your phone, and you laugh as you realise it belongs to the younger boy in the car.  
“We’ll see you soon,” Wonpil says through his own giggles; you can imagine the elated look on his face that will remain throughout hiss journey, until he steps foot into the very restaurant and crushes you and Sungjin in his arms. “Congratulations again, my friends. You two are so lucky to have each other.”

Your gaze travels to Sungjin, who stands next to you with his eyes that encapsulate a starry night sky; he pulls your free hand and kisses your knuckles, making your heart skip a beat in the dark. 

“We really are.”

You hang up the phone, all smiles and sunshine as you turn to your fiancé and hand him his phone, before proceeding to place your hand in your pocket.  
Sungjin steps closer towards you and leans his forehead against yours, allowing you the clearest view of a starry night sky you could possibly ever see. “You wanted to talk to me about something?”

“Sort of,” you breathe, reaching further into your pocket to retrieve the item you’d asked for. Delicately, you lift Sungjin’s hand and smile as you notice the blue wish bracelet, still perfectly intact as it remains attached to his wrist; only a few hours ago, he’d told you he needed the right moment to be able to break it off. Little did you know the right moment would come this very night, when you uttered the words Sungjin had been praying to the stars to hear for years. 

There’s only one missing detail you’d both forgotten to put in place.

“It’s about time this comes off; we don’t need it anymore.” Slowly, you take out the scissors and place the bracelet between the blades, meeting Sungjin’s eyes to find the approval you need. He says nothing, but the look he gives you tells you all you need to hear.  
That look that’s filled with admiration, with love; as if you’re the only thing worth shining for. 

Without another word, you snip the bracelet off and allow it to fall into the palm of your hand as Sungjin pulls you into a hug, encapsulating you in his warmth that you’ve basked in the entire night, that you promise to sink into until the next lifetime. 

“I’m so happy, sunshine,” he murmurs into your ear, and you chuckle into his own, holding the broken bracelet up high to allow it to be illuminated by the light emitting from the room. 

The wish bracelet may be a simple prize from the clawing machine, but that doesn’t lessen its simplistic beauty; the soft shade of blue is more than easy on the eyes, and the triangular pendant at its centre – 

Wait.

Your eyes widen as you bring the bracelet directly near your eyes, doubting your own vision in the dark. You trace the shape of the pendant and gasp, realising your suspicions are right.

You take a step back and cross your arms over your chest, head tilting high in Sungjin’s direction; the birthday boy furrows his eyebrows in confusion, until you lift the bracelet in front of him. 

Sungjin gulps.

“You did buy another wish bracelet! I knew it was too good to be true.”

“I can explain – “

“What happened to the “how dare you, sunshine? I take very good care of my prized possession,” crap you pulled?”

“Not crap, sunshine. I did try. But that damn thing broke off during one of our shows and – well, my wish hadn’t come true yet!”

“You’re such a liar,” you tease, poking your tongue out as Sungjin playfully sneers, pulling you back into his arms.

“A liar you agreed to marry.”

“I don’t know, it seems I have my doubts now.”

“Oh, please. Just think of this as one final surprise, yeah?” Sungjin smirks, moving his lips closer until they’re an inch away from yours, and you feel your heart melt yet again at the close proximity as your eyes focus on his lips.

“I guess I can let it slide.”

A warm grin overtakes Sungjin’s features as the glint in his eyes reappear, though it never truly left to begin with. Not since your precious moment in the park, not since eight years ago when you told him how beautiful his eyes were. His eyes that captivate you; his warmth that you’ve grown dependent on; his kisses that leave you calm and your heart in a permanent molten state; these are all the little pieces of Sungjin that you’ve come to fall for over the years, that you’ve come to cherish despite the cold, because it’s been worth it. 

Because he’s been worth it. 

Park Sungjin, and everything he is, remains the best memory you can possibly concoct. Over and over and over again. No surprises may compare.

Sungjin moves closer, wanting to entrap your lips in a longing, passionate kiss – 

When a voice is heard from inside the room.

“What are you guys doing out there? We’re hungry over here!”

You laugh wholeheartedly at Sungjin’s annoyed as hell expression as he pulls away, mumbling a string of profanities under his breath. You place yourself on your tip-toes and peck the birthday boy’s lips, raising your hand to pinch his cheek.

“Happy birthday, baby. Let’s not keep them waiting.”

Sungjin grumbles. “Those boys ruin everything.”  
“Just a wait awhile, birthday boy. The night’s still young – and you’re not the only who’s got a surprise in store.”  
You smile a wicked grin at the birthday boy before pulling him back into the room, where the familiar comfort of chicken and beer and annoying friends await you. 

As you both spend the rest of the night celebrating with the ones you love, before making your way home to experience one last surprise in the darkness of your apartment, only one thought remains in Park Sungjin’s mind throughout the entirety of the celebration.

How lucky I am to have my sunshine soon be my wife.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! Please share your feedback with me! ♡
> 
> Find more of my work on twitter: @/endlesskyh
> 
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> curiouscat.me/endlesskyh !


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